It’s day 5, baby, and I’m feeling good.
Physical symptoms: I am experiencing some pain in the back of my head. A couple little pimples this morning. Tiny ones. Detox is underway. I am having some pain in my shoulders and upper back. I did an enema this morning. I think I will get used to them.
Morning weigh in at 123, which is down 5.6 pounds from start weight! Amazing! It appears that the fat is starting to burn away, as I enter ketosis while simultaneously releasing negativity, fear, anxiety, tension, and shame. As I turn to others for support instead of isolating.
I am putting into action what I learned from my last fast and refeeding process. I think that isolation was a major hold up for me in experiencing the spiritual and emotional healing during and after my fast. My human connection mostly derived from keeping in touch with some long-distance friends, doing yoga a little bit, and seeing a couple friends on island occasionally. This time I am amping up the positive, loving heart connection BIG TIME.
I am also realizing how much I was self-sabotaging in the evenings even a few weeks ago, when I would mindlessly eat and watch TV. Of course, I felt like shit, was super sad, and was doing all I could do NOT to feel and release my emotions. I wasn’t going to as many Al-anon and ACA meetings I needed. That’s where I need to be! Truly working the program and reading the literature. Instead, I was watching TV until I fell asleep, which is also terrible from a blue light and EMF perspective.
Now, I am unplugging at least an hour before bed and reading Al-anon literature until I decide it’s time to sleep, at which point I may do Sri Mati’s Yoga Nidra.
I am experiencing so many revelations on this fast! I cannot be with myself when I gorge and overeat, so I must distract myself with TV. Instead, I am fully present now. Thinking and feeling and being in the moment as the moment unfolds.
My creativity is sky-rocketing with journaling and blog posts flowing out effortlessly. It feels liberating to get my experiences out of me, off my chest, and into the world to be of service to someone, anyone out there who is reading.
I got an interview invite with the 365 Whole Foods store in Los Angeles. I emailed them and let them know I can only skype, as I live in Monroe, LA not CA. I’ll see what they say. If its meant to be, they will allow it, if not, then whatever. I have totally let go and surrendered to this and fully trust in my higher power to present the right path before me. Gods will. It did seem strangely perfect, as I have been doing the manifesting with love meditations daily, typically visualizing being in California, health coaching, blogging, and being around healthy food, people, and community. The job would be amazing, but as I said, its up to God what his timing for me is!
My heart filled with connection and love tonight at the Art Crawl. My aunt accompanied me to the event, which is held downtown monthly to exhibit various local artists in different spaces. It was an absolute blast!
My aunt and I are so similar, and I feel like she's my mama. So so grateful to have gotten to connect with her. She stops and smells the roses and watches the birds and takes pictures of the sky, just like me. Best of all, she helped me see downtown through new eyes. I work downtown, and it’s mostly a relic of the past with lots of empty spaces. But tonight it was magical and alive!
My friend’s art was featured in a premier gallery, and I feel so honored and blessed to call that beautiful, talented woman my friend. Throughout the night, I saw lots of women in recovery, a couple of my health food cronies, and my boss. Very cool to connect with so many lovelies, be social, and feel confident and comfortable in my own skin!
There was lots of walking involved, and I managed well. During this fast, I have had no trouble with walking anywhere from 1-5 miles per day. This is in contrast to my last fast, during which I was largely bedridden. As a result, I had lots of pain in my neck and back, felt quite restless, and had trouble sleeping. I also had a pretty uncomfortable, small futon bed.
I feel so grateful, blessed, and happy in my life presently. It's amazing and shocking. Happy in Monroe! Feeling loved and connected and confident and beautiful AS I AM, AN IMPERFECT BEING. That, my friends, is self-acceptance.
Published by Taylor Norris