As a woman, I’ve learned through a series of events, faith challenges and disappointments to admit when I’m not OK. Many times as women we put on a facade in order to keep people from knowing that we’re truly hurting. Sometimes it’s hard to express your feelings to the people around you. Not because you’re afraid of what they’ll say, but because we may not want to appear weak and our culture doesn’t seem to be very keen on being honest about their hurts. We all desire to be strong, yet there are times when we need to be able to admit when we’re not OK.
If there is one thing I’m not known for, it’s crying and showing a lot of emotion. I’ve learned over the years working with hurting people not to allow my feelings and emotions to show when ministering. I’ve always managed to keep a game face when I was going through tough times and ministering to others. As I continue to grow in my ministry, I find myself openly showing or expressing compassion because I understand a woman’s pain and need for encouragement during tough times. Compassion is a powerful feeling. It is a way to connect and reach out to others. Women especially need other women to to encourage them.
It’s OK to cry sometimes, just don’t wallow in your sorrows. There is nothing wrong with crying and letting out a few tears. It’s not a sign of weakness. The Bible says in Psalm 58, God keeps track of our sorrows. “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book” (Psalm 56:8). In the moment of mixed emotions, we desperately need God’s comfort and reassurance. In Psalm 56:8, God reminds us He is intimately concerned with every aspect of our lives. He doesn’t judge whether our sorrow is “valid.” But because of His compassion, He catches every tear that is shed. It doesn’t matter how big or small, trivial or important, the sorrow might be.
It’s OK to get frustrated sometimes, just don’t allow frustration to overtake you. The light at the end of the tunnel is knowing that God has everything under control, even when we ourselves do not. Several weeks ago I fractured my right wrist as a result of an unfortunate incident. At times I became very frustrated because I am right handed and could not function as normal. Yet during this time I had to cast my cares upon God knowing that He cares for me and to be at peace no matter what condition I was in. The peace of God would keep me! The enemy would love nothing more than to consume us with frustration. The Bible says he walks around looking to for someone to devour.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” (1 Peter 5:7-10)
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7)
It’s OK to get stressed sometimes, just don’t let stress become who you are. When you come into areas of your life that are considered stressful, realize that it’s only going to last as long as you allow it to. Stress is unavoidable, but allowing it to control your life is not. One of my favorite Scriptures and of the very words spoken to me during times of trouble is John 14:1.
“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me.” (John 14:1)
I’m here to tell you women of God, that it’s ok to admit you’re not ok sometimes. It’s okay to admit that you’re hurting, broken or even confused about your present circumstances in life. It’s OK. God has a Word for you to see you through those dark and difficult places in life. Jesus is the great healer; the mender of broken hearts. Believe in Him!
Published by Dr. A. Francine Green