1. Call her pet names

You may think it makes her melt into a puddle on the floor when you call her babe, or baby. But it actually makes us women cringe beyond belief. Seriously, stop.

2. Ask for nudes

You’d think it’s just common sense not to ask this right? Well as it turns out not a lot of men have any, because nothing says I Love You like a message saying “I wanna see you naked ;)” if you do this then you will essentially cock block yourself. Congrats!

3. Brag about how many people you’ve slept with, or how good in bed you are

Do I even need to explain this? NO girl will ever want to hear about all the hood rats you’ve banged in the past, if she doesn’t ask then don’t tell her. And chances are if you’re bragging about how good in bed you are, you’re probably shit anyway.

4. Tell her you love her

There is nothing more off-putting than a premature I love you. It makes us feel physically sick and maybe even a little terrified. If you like the girl, don’t be a total jackass and creep her out k?

5. Bang on about your ex

Ok we get it, she dumped you for some dick who probably has a bigger one than you do. Don’t go on about it! It’s so unattractive when a dude complains about shit like that, and it’ll make us think you still love them. Let’s be serious if you’re doing that, you probably do.  

6. Try and bang her prematurely

Okay some of us girls actually have standards, and would rather be waterboarded than have sex with you early on. Get to know her before you try and sleep with her, it isn’t difficult. Patience can be rewarding.

7. Flirt with people in front of her to “make her jealous”

We will just fuck you off if you do this, it will not make us like you more. It will make us think you’re a total dick.

8. Diss her friends

You may as well just walk away now if you’ve already done this, cause she’s gonna run a mile anyway. She’s probably known her friends longer than she’s known you... so who d’you think is higher on the totem pole?

9. Ignore her messages for days on end

Absence does NOT make the heart grow fonder, it makes you look like an asshole!

10. Lie about yourself to make you seem more impressive

If you end up getting with her, she’s gonna find out that you’re lying anyway. So save yourself the embarrassment. 

Published by Daisy Cooper