Going to an all-girls grammar school in the South of England is okay. I guess you can't really describe school as anything else; how exciting can it be?

Although I really do like the school I attend, I have decided to calculate a list (not ranked) of 15 things that suck most about going to my school.

Please enjoy.

  1. ​Although the drama and cattiness is mildly entertaining, my “love life” is not. In fact, my “love life” is completely non existent; not even a scent of lynx near me. Depressing right?
  2. It’s a common misconception that the majority of girls skive sports lessons, sitting on the field making daisy chains. Not true my friend, not true. The competitiveness between the girls in PE lessons is off the scale, with sports day showcasing this. *Not great for un-athletic individuals like me. (I came 13/14 in 1500m last sports day. Fml.) 
  3. Don’t even get me started on academic competition. 
  4. At least half of the people in your class are moody, hormonal wrecks who have over 600 followers on Instagram and you have no idea how or why. *I long for the day when I can waltz through the school knowing that everyone is terrified/ in awe of me at the same time. (Basically I long for the day when I am a living Regina George)
  5. The endless talk about parties (that you were not cool enough to attend) is mind numbing. I get it, you enjoyed Jazmine’s party five months ago, but do you really need to address this every maths lesson? 
  6. You can’t get away from the little 12 year old girls playing hide and seek with their massive rucksacks that would probably pass as a suitable size for a hike up Everest. 
  7. Every birthday party is heavily thought out; the invitation list so intricate that everyone important is going, with a few dodgy invites and potential awkward moments to make your party the most talked about one for a couple of days. *A couple of days too long
  8. No one understands sarcasm, meaning that I have to explain my jokes all of the time, almost always followed by an explanation as to why that person shouldn’t be offended by the punch line. 
  9. My school recently altered the school rules so that girls aren’t allowed to leave to go to the toilet during lessons. This is okay if you have a normal sized bladder (some don’t and literally need to take a dump at least every other hour). However if it’s, you know, that time of the month and you really need the toilet, having male teachers is a pain in the backside. What do you say? Sorry mate, if you don’t let me leave I will bleed on the carpet like a scared elephant and it won’t be pleasant.
  10. Feminism is rammed down your throat in a verbally aggressive way. 
  11. The younger years are scared of you and the older years judge you, there is no in between. Can we all just be friends? *lol no way 
  12. Everyone’s obsessed with cake and it’s scary.
  13. There are actual debates about who the best Kardashian-Jenner sister is. Yes, seriously. 
  14. Nothing stays secret for too long, (depending on your friends and their loyalty). So make sure to surround yourself with the quiet ones. 
  15. So. Much. Bitchiness. I. Cannot. Cope. 

I guess high school isn’t that bad…


Best wishes,



Published by Sofia MacKeith