I’m lost, like most other 20-somethings are. If you’re lost, that’s good.

I’m 21 this year. I live in Singapore. I completed my National Service of 2 years. I’m entering university to study Life Science this August and I’m lost.

I have never felt so lost in my life. This is the first time when difficult life decisions are left for me to make. In the past, it was always easy, either A or B and sometimes a C but never would I have to take the time to think about it, never would I need days to make a decision because I would already know what I want before the question was even raised. An example would be in junior college where we were asked to choose between the Science stream and the Arts stream, without hesitation, I chose the Science stream because I knew that I have always been fascinated about the sciences and thus, it would be easier for me.

But now, once I have graduated from junior college, with results in hand, I was left on my own. I was left to choose and pursue any one of the countless degrees, majors and fields of study. I was lost. 

Since I was very young, I knew that I wanted to pursue the sciences and thus, every academic decision of my life since then was made to continue my studies in the sciences. Therefore, I know that I would pursue Life Science in university. However, deep inside, I had other interests. I was interested in the Economics, Medicine, Political Science. Furthermore, there were questions on whether I should pursue my studies overseas. The longer I think, the more choices there are and the more lost I become. 

I spent a lot of my time thinking about it, writing down the pros and cons, asking friends and family, even to the extend of flipping a coin, and I came to a realisation:

IT DOES NOT MATTER.

I realised that it does not matter what major I chose, it does not matter what ‘life-changing’ decision I made, hell, it does not even matter whether I go to a university or not. All that matters is that I put in my very best in the decision that I make and be solely responsible for that decision. After all, university is one of the many paths one could take just like deciding to start a business or be a writer. 

This is especially relevant to young adults like me. All of us have time —god-willing— to pursue what we want. You do not need to attend university if you do not want to. You do not need to get a degree, a masters or a Ph.D if you do not want to. You can be a photographer for all I care.

We’re lucky, young people like you and me, we’re lucky because we have so many opportunities now than ever before, and with opportunities comes the chance for success. 

Therefore, if you’re lost, that’s good. Allow yourself to explore, to know that it does not matter which path you choose. 

For me, I have decided to pursue university and study Life Sciences because it has always been my dream. Even though I am not entirely confident that I am making the right decision, I am confident that at the end of it all, it does not matter as long as I put in my best and take full responsibility for the failures that might come.

 

 

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Published by Mohamad Hakim