TGIF Treadmill Treats

Being complete with myself

Everyone loves that line from the Tom Cruise movie "You complete me"

Yes, its all romantic to think that you found someone and they  
completed you but the reality is you need to be complete before you find someone because really no one can complete you.

Look I am the most romantic peson you can meet, I believe in happily ever afters and all that comes along with it but I have been on this earth for quite a long time and I am  realistic. I know you need to unpack and go through your issues, you need to own your stuff before you carry that suitcase with you on to the next relationship.

That's the problem with so many people, they are going from one relationship to the next without a break, without owning their issues and then they wonder why the next relationship isn't working? Hello! Maybe it's you?

I am complete, I love myself, I took 2 years without dating to figure out what was my issues and to forgive him of his. I have been enjoying my singleness, I have many friends, I am part of the singles ministry in church, 
I go out to dinner, to shows,
I go on vacations and I go to concerts.

I hang with my girls with my undivided attention, 
I am good with my own company and I truly love my life just as it is, I don't need someone to complete me, I am complete.

Now saying all of that, it would be nice to find someone to spend quality time with, someone to laugh with, to hold hands with, to know that someone has your back and loves you for you.

Even with all the hurt and pain I have suffered in my lifetime (read my book to find out all the juicy details)
I still will open my heart up to someone else, when he shows up. Yes, I would even get remarried even after my horrible marriage because living without love is not living at all but if God chooses that that is not for me, I will still be okay because I am okay with myself.

It's like saying when I lose the weight I will go to the gym, when I get the promotion I will finally arrive, when I find a man my life will really start...Hello! Your missing out on your life waiting for things that may or may not happen and for what reason? 

Because you think you need these things to make you better, to make you complete and whole. These things will never fill the void, the hole you have in your heart, only you can fill that hole but there's a catch... of course there is your saying.

The catch is you have to be brutally honest with yourself, you have to look deep within and own your faults, you have to be willing to admit your failures and work on changing the things that aren't working.

Look I owned I was a liar, that I had an emotional affair and checked out of my marriage 5 years before the end, I owned I gave up my power to this man, 
I owned that I didn't love or even liked myself back then, I owned my negative thoughts about hating my life, yes this was all me and I took ownership of it all.

So I worked on changing these things, I read, I went to consulting, I took classes, I forgave (ohh...big one) and I stopped looking outside and looked inside until I was good with me and I was complete.

So today my friends remember no one can complete you, you need to step up, you need to own your shortcomings, you need to do the work and you need to love yourself just the way you are now only then will you be ready to open your heart to find someone who is also completed and share your lives together.

"Be the change you want to see"
"And just when the caterpillar thought his life was over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

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Published by Francesca Villardi (Treadmill Treats)