So, Fathers day has come and gone and I saw this image on Facebook. Someone had posted it suggesting they should be receiving one of theses from their children. Now all this says to me is that there is some hate and anger towards her children’s dad.

 fathers day

But to me I do not think this is right to portray fathers in this way to say they are useless and a twat. Do not get me wrong there are some pretty shitty dads out there who do not try or care for their offspring. But there are other males out there who are struggling and trying to see their children to earn enough money to provide. Children should be allowed to make their own decision about whether their parent is useless or not. Rather than being told that their parent is this or not or not good enough. Surely you’d think this hate and anger would cause dysfunctional relationships, being told that their male role model, their main male in their life is a twat.

Nice one.

When my parents divorced and my dad was off doing whatever and not really keeping in contact with me and my brother, my mum always told us ‘your dad loves you’ ‘your dads a lovely man’. Always spoke of him positively to us. Whereas my dad on the other hand liked to call my mother a witch. haha. Each to their own. I would never say my dad was useless, hes forgetful sometimes I think is the kinder way to put it. But he does try and when he tries he puts all his effort in. Even when he hasn’t been there for us when we needed him or providing us with money or anything, I would never call him useless.

There are people out there with no fathers, no mothers. How is it fair for us to produce so much anger towards a parental figure. when others would do unspeakable things to have their parents back, to see them one more time. I mean you even have fathers for justice that are fighting to see their children. It is not right for a parent to be so biased and to tell their kids shit like that. If you want to protect them from him there’s other more positive ways to do so.

Just stuff like this on social media rubs me up the wrong way. I know its just light hearted and a bit of banter, but I think it does reflect how people act in real life and how they truly behave and feel. That’s what scares me. Nothing I can do, just hope that this doesn’t effect a future generation and hope that they can have healthy relationships with their parents. So many psychological studies show that if you don’t form healthy relationships with your parents when growing up if effects your adult relationships. So maybe these mothers should think before forcing so much hate into their children against their fathers, whether that man is useless or not, that child shares genes from that man. It can turn to self loathing when people say ‘your just like your father’ yet they are told hes  a useless twat.

Published by Katy-Jane Pitt