Today, we have grown to believe the illusion that women have a perfect checklist when they are looking for a lifetime partner. Is he tall enough? Does he have an exotic accent? Is his body muscular enough? Does he have a job that pays well? These and many more are what is believed the questions that interest women when looking for love. However,  have you ever wondered how much of this is actually true...

Honestly, as a woman I can reassure you most of this illusion is build up and developed no thanks to the american romantic comedies. Real women might have high standards but are still relatively realistic and trust me when we meet a man, we do not go into full analysis of his budget or of his personality. We simply want to enjoy a company of a man that can keep conversation flowing and that can keep us interested. Who cares how many languages he speaks if he makes you feel special? 

So, I had some help from women of different age, culture and background who have shared their experiences, thoughts and simply revealed what they find to be most attractive in men. Here's what the truth:

1. “A man has to make a woman laugh or puts a smile on her face that for me is the most attractive aspect of a man”

Having a sense of humour is crucial! If you can make your girl laugh, you are already successful with her.

2.“I think it's all about the attitude. He has to act like a man but must make you feel like a princess. It's someone who is not afraid of a new adventure and agrees to share his passion and be is interested in ours too. The physical looks are not the most important but his smile, his charm and his eyes should make you feel completely crazy about him...”

Attitude. It is as equally important in men like it is in women. Always keep this in mind.

3.“The first thing that catches my attention is his confidence when he walks into a room, the way he treats me and definitely his eyes. The truth is always in the eyes. For me it is important when a man talks to you that he looks into your eyes. A man will also catch my attention by the way he acts around his friends and the way he treats me in an unknown to me setting. A man that knows and shows that he too believes a true relationship is build on mutual trust and respect - is my kind of man.”

Needless to say, a woman wants a real man, who knows how take decisions and who can be self-confident and confident in his actions. Someone who can man up and be responsible, no one wants to be around someone indecisive - that's not too much to ask for is it?

4.“Les hommes qui partagent: te font rentrer dans leur monde/projet- que ce monde soit réel ou impossible/imaginaire. Sa reaction face a l'imprevu. Souvent lorseque je rencontre quelqu'un, et je sens qu'il y'a une attraction, je le teste. Pour cela j'aime utiliser l'absurde: je peux aussi bien lui parler d'un fait divers et prendre une position honteuse sur un sujet pour voir sa reaction. Ainsi je vois si il rentre aussi dans mon jeu.”

This one is important: the ability of letting your girl into your world and being able to be spontaneous and adventurous is something that women definitely enjoy seeing in men. 

5.“I, just like many men, am attracted to looks first and foremost. That’s just the laws of attraction. Once I’ve surpassed the physical attraction, it then becomes about intellect. Not just in the sense of how smart someone is, or what they can bring to the table but also how well the understand women and their needs. More specifically, how much interest they’re putting in to getting to know me, how do they hold conversations; are they interested about my day or are they just sending me short text messages out of boredom. Most women want to settle down, they don’t want multiple partners or flings. Most women I know want to be with one person and one person only. But women, at least speaking for myself, want to be heard. Take for instance text messages, personally when I’m getting to know a man I want the exchanges to be “created equal.” I don’t want a one sentence text. That’s juvenile for me and at that point, I’m just wasting time. I want a nice paragraph. If a man can show me that he really wants to get to know me, then I know he’s planning to be invested, and that, is what make you twice as attractive to me.”

Gentleman, here is the truth. As mentioned above "women want to be heard". At the end of the day, women do not ask for extraordinary or supernatural qualities in a man. It is all rather solid and realistic, to have someone who doesn't just listen to you just to reply - but someone who actually cares about what you have to say. Someone who can understand that the relationship based on trust and honesty is something that is worth investing your time in. Any relationship takes time and effort and women like to know that their loved one is willing to be part of the beautiful journey together regardless of challenges that come ahead.

Hopefully, we all take something out of this little experiment and we all realise that a "perfect checklist" is merely an overrated illusion.

Published by Karina Saakyan