Almost immediately after my husband and I were married I developed a deep yearning to become a mother. There was a strong burning desire in my heart to love, care for and nurture children. The intensity of this desire truly surprised me because prior to my husband and I meeting my focus was placed more on my career than any other part of my life. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted children, by birth and adoption; however, that part of my future was not considered to be a priority at the time. As I look back, I now realize the strong desire that consumed me for a few years after my wedding, was placed on the inside of me for a purpose. There was a plan and yes there was a purpose. A plan that God himself had devised. A plan, that in the end, would give me my heart’s desire, give God His glory and prove that he is not a liar.

My journey to motherhood was far from an easy one. The pathway there was filled with tears, prayers, long talks, and feelings of being unworthy and incomplete. I was not focused on how I would become a mother; as I stated before, I always knew I wanted to experience birth and adoption.  I just truly longed to be a mother. The inner struggle I dealt with was often the culprit that caused me to be distracted at times, jealous on some days, and doubtful on many days. However, my emotional roller coaster and spells of wavering did not change the promise that God had made, specifically to me. He was faithful to his promise and although the process getting there was long and difficult; the end resulted in me becoming a mother to three beautiful, healthy and vibrant children by birth and adoption. God made me a promise that he would give me my heart’s desire, and he stood by his word. The promise was fulfilled at the appointed time.

As Christians, it is not uncommon for us to find ourselves in situations that may cause us to question ourselves, our actions, and even the plan and will of God. Many of us often find ourselves in what I like to consider a “wilderness experience”; a place that can keep us in bondage mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. These are the experiences or situations that we ourselves have no power to change, and regardless of how much we seem to pray and/or believe, it seems as though the situation never does. In some instances, the problem seems to get bigger while the solution seems impossible or nonexistent. I personally believe that these are opportunities for God to show his unlimited power to believers and nonbelievers alike. These opportunities allow him to affirm that he is a faithful God and that he will not make a promise that he will not fulfill. Now, I do understand that some promises are conditional and that we may choose to deny or reject things that God desires for us to have, but God will always hold up his end. He always has and he always will.

In the midst of any wilderness experience or gloomy situation, we must attempt to focus on God’s word and his promises. Regardless of whether the situation involves health issues, financial issues, broken relationships, a desire for marriage, a desire for children, marital issues, behavioral issues with children, and more, we must remember that there is no situation that is more powerful than God! He is the ultimate and supreme authority and in the end the final say is his. It is important to realize that when we dwell on any thought that is contrary to the word of God, then we are unintentionally treating him as though he has lied to us. God is a limitless God; however, he chose to put limitations on himself, for our sake and his name’s sake. He cannot lie to us. This is not a guarantee that we will not endure trials, moments of suffering, and even losing loved ones. The word of God specifically tells us that these things will happen. We will suffer, we will have hard times, and at some point, everyone must face death. However, he has also promised us help, comfort, strength, peace, deliverance, and healing. We know that there will be a night of weeping but, he has also promised a morning of joy.

We as people of God must stay encouraged and continue to believe. Although there may be moments where things seem hopeless, we should always remember that he is, “I Am”; in other words, he is our hope when there seems to be no hope. He is our joy when there seems to only be misery. He is our peace when everything is chaotic. He is our everything. Whatever we may need or desire is found in him. When situations do not turn out as we desire, know that God is still at work. As long as we love him, he has promised that even disappointments, will work for our good. His word was given for a purpose, and he will always stand by his word. His word is truth and only truth. He will not lie! In every problem, we must learn to allow God the opportunity to show that he is a healer, a deliverer, a void filler, a provider and so much more. We must obtain a different level of faith and trust in the midst of those wilderness experiences. It is imperative that we do not stay discouraged and that we remember God is not a liar!


" God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good? Behold, I have received commandment to bless: and he hath blessed; and I cannot reverse it."  Numbers 23:19-20

Published by Kwajalein Johnson