Why's Everybody Always Pickin On Me?

In the culture of my upbringing and in later life my dragging around, Mormon beliefs about this fellow Satan are quite specific. Satan is the villain in the LDS drama theology. Without this eternal Oil Can Harry, a lot of what is offered in the name of good versus evil would have much less substance. However, Mormons are not unique in bearing a literal-minded acceptance of an belief in the reality of Satan, known elsewhere as Lucifer among other handles. I use the Mormon sample because that is the Satan in whom I sustained a literal belief for half my adult life.
There's the official LDS PR statement about Satan/Lucifer - buttressed as usual by literalistic scripture reading:
Answering Media Questions About Jesus and Satan
This statement has been expanded since it was originally released on 12 December 2007.
Like other Christians, we worship Jesus Christ as the divine Son of God. Satan is a fallen angel, diametrically opposite from Christ in every attribute. As the prophet Isaiah wrote, “How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning!”
The Apostle Paul wrote that God is the Father of all. This means that all intelligent beings were created by God and are His spirit children. Jesus Christ represents all that is good, true, virtuous, merciful, just and godly. Lucifer is the adversary of everything that Christ stands for. He embodies all that is evil, false, immoral, and devoid of any trace ofgoodness or divine light.
He is the enemy of God and of every human being who seeks to follow Christ.
There's an endless roster of ecclesiastic sermonizing against Oil Can Harry. Some of the more recent, and mind you, these are verbally dispensed with few if any smiles, in an almost funereal gravity and in full assertion that Harry is no laughing matter.
O That Cunning Plan of the Evil One - Apostle Ballard
Withstand Every Temptation of the Devil - W. Rolfe Kerr
Satan's Bag of Snipes - Richard C. Edgely
Dare to Stand Alone - President Thomas S. Monson
From my perspective, a case could be made that Satan is the biggest myth - not only of Mormon theology, but across the entirety of atonement-based Christianity. However … and if I must start my "however" with holy scripture, I could begin with that trouble maker that God authorizes in Job … and I can see mischief in the tradition of other points of view.
To wit ...Them pesky Pagans and their more grown-up and believable evaluation of resistance, temptation, allure and mark-missing. (Notice, "mark-missing" is my mistake-descriptor of choice. I do not believe in "sin.") …
Wouldn't it be hard to be terrified and wary from someone whose actions and motivations are better explained and understood, and accurately compared to Lex Luthor, Oil Can Harry, Captain Hook and the Gremlins?
And this from what I consider to be a superior class of mythology upon which to base a reverence to reality system of belief.
There ya have it.
So here's my guy ... and as my current tactic for internally responding in my own knee-jerk way to the tossing around of the Satan/Devil/Evil-One like ketchup and mustard at a barbecue.
The following is the internal image I cultivate every time some sober-faced or tear-stained testifier preaches about The So-Called Adversary:

Published by Arthur Ruger