Well, here I am.

I'm the farthest thing from a professional writer, and all things considered I'm barely a blogger. But nevertheless here we are.

I write about what I know.

I write about the incredible moments in my life. I write about my insane friends and our unbelievable adventures. I write about Professional Wrestling. I write about my love of cinema and the ever evolving pop culture landscape.

So here I am at your door (or internet browser), ready to enlighten you on what I know.

This past weekend I went to a friend's wedding, a celebration of eternal love and a reminder that unless divine intervention takes place I will never be getting married*. I'm not against marriage mind you, I'm just not sure it's for me. I can barely commit to more than two dates to have a sustained romantic relationship, let alone devote the rest of my life to that person in the bonds of holy matrimony.

The Groom (Will) is an old wrestling friend of mine who reconnected with a girl (Amanda, the Bride) years later after knowing each other during their awkward teens. Using the interweb as an intermediary Will eventually went to visit her in Florida after they began talking. He promptly returned from his trip announcing his intentions to move to Florida and give this whole relationship thing a shot. A month later he was FL bound and three years later they returned to Massachusetts for their wedding weekend. At the time I was envious of Will's commitment to change since I was going through a long distance romance of my own, to see him uproot his entire life in order to give love a fighting chance. Obviously it paid off for the guy, but I also wondered about the 'What Ifs' and ratio of failure versus success.

I was willing to sacrifice everything I had built to chase a woman I was madly in love with. In the end she chose 'the other guy.' 9 out of 10 times they always choose the other guy, this isn't a John Cusack movie after all. While it was the toughest thing to ever walk away from I eventually came to terms with what was lost. What I had was a roller coaster, many highs with just as many lows. It wasn't meant to last.

That's why it was so heartening to see Will build this family for himself and succeed where the majority (Me) failed. Too many of my friends got married too young, had kids with people they couldn't stand, and overall screwed themselves before getting the chance to live their lives on their terms.

Will did it right**, and never looked happier saying "I Do" to the woman he loved. I'd like to believe true love exists, I'm just not sure it extends to me and my future. I'm in the minority among my friends these days. I have no kids, I have no wife, and I still live with my perpetually adolescent roommate. Mind you this doesn't make me unhappy, it makes me feel confident in my solitude. Some people can't stand the idea of being alone, but to me I look forward to the moments of seclusion and reflection.

Sitting there this weekend I couldn't help but think maybe I'm the one that's been giving up on love the last couple years, not the other way around. Maybe it was time to open myself back up and give people a chance.

I said in the beginning I write about what I know, but the truth is when it comes to the affairs of love I just don't know...


*Divine intervention could be a lot of things. I can't emphatically say I'll never get married, but let's just put it at 80% that I will. That seems solid. When I was 21 I was propositioned to marry a co-worker so she could get a green card, but my morals got the better of me.

**Will isn't the only friend who's gone about things the right way. My best friend Ruy married his longtime girlfriend last October and they are truly an amazing couple.


Published by John Casey