People always say to fall in love with yourself first. However, how many of us actually know how to do that? We normally associate the term “falling in love” with people who we are romantically involved with. However, we fall in love with so many different things in different ways every single day. We fall in love with the coffee we drink, the books we read, and even people who we look up to. So why is it that we can’t fall in love with ourselves?

The real problem is that we are so wrapped up in loving different people, places, and even things that we forget our own well-being. And for some, we just don’t know where to begin.

Maybe you just got out of a relationship that consumed all of your love that you feel you have none left for yourself, or maybe you have always been self-conscious so self-acceptance isn’t any easy task for you. Whatever the reason is, I hope that you give all of these tips a chance and hopefully it can make a difference in your life.

1. Embrace your own company

In high school, I had been the type of person who loved to be surrounded by people. At the time I believed that being an extrovert meant that I always had to be around people to be content. I was always with my friends at school and when I came home my mom and my brother were always around. This means that I never really got the chance to be by myself until college started. At first it was scary and weird to walk the halls, eat lunch by myself, or come home to an empty house. However, I quickly learned that you won’t always walk through life holding someone’s hand or vice versa. I learned to be independent and to be comfortable with myself and most importantly learned that I am more than enough for myself.

Think about it: who do we spend the most time with? Ourselves! This means that it’s important for us to appreciate and embrace our own company and to be kind to ourselves. How do we expect to be happy if the person who we are with all the time doesn’t like us?

2. Get to know yourself

I read somewhere that falling in love with yourself starts with the process of understanding your true nature. For example, think about the time you were falling in love or started developing feelings for someone. It always started with meeting someone who you thought was interesting and getting to know that person. We can do this with ourselves too. Ask yourself this: what do you like to do, to eat, to play? What are your passions and goals in life? What type of music do you listen to? These are the things that other people find interesting about you. It’s possible that you don’t even know some of the answers for some of these questions so dip deep and find all of the interesting things about you.

Take the time to think about the things that feeds your soul and sparks your interest. What are the things that make you genuinely happy? These are important things that we should know about ourselves. Discover them. Trust me, you’ll have the time of your life figuring these out.

3. Give Love

Give the same love you give to a lover, friend, a parent, or sibling to yourself. You know you are capable of giving great love and you are the one most deserving of it so don’t forget to share that with yourself as well. Do things like buy yourself a flower, tell yourself you’re beautiful, or take yourself on dates. Do kind things to yourself as you would to people you love. You’re just as important, if not more.