Fitting in. I really want to know who coined this phrase. Quite a useful one , you know.

I don't know about others, but I have often found myself struggling with this idea of  'fitting in' . Fitting into a group, fitting into a class, fitting in a culture, fitting into a society!

Is it really necessary to fit in to be a part of something?

For quite a long time, I have thought it was. I thought it was imperative to fit into a group to have a sense of belonging , to feel good about yourself,to feel you are normal, like others. Of late though, I have come to realise it doesn't really matter whether you fit in or not - the only thing that matters is what you are happy with.If fitting into a social circle gives you happiness, make your efforts to fit in. But if you think its all pretentious and has nothing to do with your happiness, just stay away .

Yes, stay away .That's the way I like it! Staying away from the crowd that likes being loud .Staying away from the crowd that makes you feel inferior. Staying away from the crowd which doesn't value your thoughts . Staying away from falseness that shows. Staying away from all that hinders your full growth (sometimes it takes a while to realise even this).

For long have I wondered why can't I be like all those people who seem happiest when their crowd is around ;for long I have thought of why I can't get myself to be truly comfortable in any such crowd.

Crowds make you act in a certain way. Its just an observation, you may not agree. But I have seen people acting so differently in a group than when they are in a one on one conversation with me, that its just seems true.

And now, I'm glad I have realised staying away is what I needed. I am happier alone, than with the wrong people. Earlier this 'being alone' felt strange, now it doesn't . It feels good to finally be at peace with myself.

I have my solitude as well as my people, though they are not my 'crowd' ; for people are what I feel comfortable with, not the pretentious , fake,self-centered crowd.

Dear readers, please let me know your views by commenting here or on my blog!

Published by Smita Patil