On special occasions, when we are able to escape the sensibility of our own head and reach out beyond our cloistered environment, the question then becomes, how do we touch?

How do we use our hands in a constructive format that isn’t clumsy or ham-fisted? There is a severe danger in trying to over-complicate our lives, by studying our motives to such a degree that we are frightened to motivate.

But there is one enlightening approach that never fails to deliver an exciting conclusion. When we don’t know how to touch the lives of other people, find a moment, an opportunity to pat them on the back–literally.

Understanding that people are disappointed, grief-stricken, uncertain or wounded, rather than trying to force our thoughts into their space, we can pause before leaving the room and touch them on the shoulder.

There is no greater tool of communication than the passing graze on the shoulder or the pat on the back.

Nothing needs to be said, no note is required to explain the meaning–just the simple confirmation expressed by that motion personifying, “I’ve got your back” takes any frustrated human traveler to tears.

It is the prudent, kind, tender and economic use of our touch.It doesn’t demand that the receiver be grateful or that they converse about their sensations concerning the overture.

It is the first step in understanding the Handbook on Hands.

  • Don’t speak.
  • Don’t become angry.
  • Don’t editorialize.
  • Don’t hug.

As you leave the room, pat their shoulder.

It is powerful.

Published by Jonathan Cring