We talk so much about love and romance but with time the thoughts are drifting more to question whether love is real or if it is a fiction, an illusion that was created by humans as a distraction from reality. I used to believe that love truly exists and that there is someone out there that will come into my life and let me see that I didn't waste time dreaming of something that I can now have and share. Yet, with time, I have come to realise that love is a calculated risk - a solution for distraction, a means to an end.

Love/Marriage all part of a life plan

For some people, it is part of their life plan: go to school, get a college degree, get married, have kids, etc. In this case it does not matter who the person is - it is more about the timing. If you meet that person at a time that you have defined for yourself for marriage, you will propose to them so you are not running behind your timeline. If you are lucky, a good relationship may come out of this. What are the chances though? In this case, love is a calculated and rational choice you make. There is little of that dreamy romance that you read in books about. Is this what we are looking for? Securing a companion for a lifetime with no feelings or any attraction?

Passionate kind of love

What about passion? Love at first sight kind of passion. Does that lead to anything good? There is no romance in this kind of love either. Passion, attraction - all there yes but just as fast the light was lit it will fade away and then you are left with nothing. Are we now calling "hot sex" love?

Love out of convenience

The most common kind of love - love out of convenience. This is when you have been in a relationship long enough for you to take the next step but not enough for you to actually act on this. It is usually when you are happy with your significant other and yet something is missing from your relationship. 

Friends with benefits - FWB

Let us not forget that there is also the love that is born out friendship. Sometimes this may not be the worse kind of love, perhaps, even in some twisted way the more realistic kind of love. But is it ever truly love? or is it all about the benefits?

Romance? Does it even exist?

I have started doubting that romance even exists. The kind of love that you feel weak in your knees when you kiss, when he looks at you and nothing else matters. When you are not thinking about the future but living in the moment. Is this simply fiction? Did we really outgrow romance?

Honestly, when I was little, I used to dream of a prince charming, love and romance and idealised everything in this world. Today, I am one of many hopeless romantics, believing in a fiction, illusion, hallucination that does not exist. 

 

Published by Karina Saakyan