Sotd: since I've last posted there's been a bunch of bangers but cal scruby, riles and sigrid are fire. Finally got the will to post again. Well it's not really a willpower thing, this is more like deciding to flick a light switch for the first time in ages because it doesn't really feel like effort, the words flow out like verbal detritus. There's always one little thing that characterizes your day, the one repeating theme. Today's was the whole private school thing, the benefit of it all. One strange thing I did notice at the summer school I went to literally everyone went to a private school, like I'm talking 90% of the kids there were privately educated and I'm not sure. The standard of teaching is probably better but there's always people in state schools that score better or do better in certain subjects. Plus with the sheer amount more we would expect a little bit of parity. My theory on it all is that there's things you learn at a private school that are lost elsewhere. There's the obvious things like better career help and more advice given but I doubt its that honestly. Perhaps I've been reading too much into that 40 minute psychology lesson I do a week but I think there is this psychological difference. To actually be looking out for things like the programme and to apply for it takes "balls" or at least it doesn't seem to be a thing lots of people do. I almost didn't do it, didn't really see a point in trying then I realized I was being a little bitch and made myself do it (and then subsequently failed my physics exam the day after). You think you can do more. People have their own ideas of what is possible and I think we have a higher expectation of what can be done and what you can do and honestly that's great. Is it worth the money? I'm not in a position to really answer that especially since I can't live two lives at once in an AB test but I think it will prove one of the better investments my parents have ever made. So that's my two cents, not really legible, still working on the coherency of these things. In other news I'm happy with how the years started, I'm working well, I've started way better than I ever have and that's good news. I need to take cold showers seriously again and force myself to do some things I haven't been doing properly recently but apart from that its going good.

Published by Kevin Li