download-72Want to hear something funny? Early Friday morning, I’m talking 2 maybe 3 in the morning, I wrote a list of task to accomplish before Monday, weekend goals I guess you could say. It’s 7:32 pm on Saturday and I’ve managed to complete not a single task, smh. I’m actually shocked at how unproductive my weekend has been. Yesterday I was supposed to go to the nail shop and hair store and work not just on my goals but work, work too, lol. I ended up only going to the hair store, which despite not being a goal I’m glad I did, unintentionally I ended up going straight to sleep after doing my hair, not seeing any clients or posting any blogs. I’m a little disappointed because I tried my HARDEST to post a blog, the post for today was from yesterday, but I kept either falling asleep or losing my place when proofreading so I said fck it.

New followers, be glad you weren’t following me earlier in the beginning of the Oh god, it was horrible. Despite feeling exhausted or aggressively enraged, I posted blogs that were grammatically incorrect and made absolutely no sense whatsoever, it may have been obvious I was intoxicated when writing a few, or most. You think I’m reckless now? LMAO, you would have hated me before, talk about ranting. What’s a word worse than reckless? Whatever you think of, that’s how I was before. I started blogging for my client’s, and never expected #ShyTalk to turn into all it has. I was satisfied when a client told me,

“It’s nice to see you’re a real person dealing with real life problems and aren’t crazy!”

download-70Not able to vouch for not being crazy, but to see I’m real was the purpose when I made the blog! Within the first hour of writing my very first blog for my client’s, someone emailed me the most admirable, heartfelt, motivational, unforgettable email ever. They told me about their deceased wife and having to raise their 4 daughters on their own and the challenges they’ve gone through. Despite possibly scaring him for life with my story, he admired the fact that I wasn’t just strong enough to overcome my past but willing to share it with you all. He raised 4 daughters but think I’m strong? That’s funny. It didn’t take long for #ShyTalk to obtain a fan base and not one of them thought I should “tone it down” and the stories I wrote then were WAY worse than anything I’ve written here.

Although I’m loved by many, there is and will always be people who don’t like me, my writing too, and that idgaf attitude I have about people not liking me, I need to have about people not liking my writing. Just like I can’t make people like me, I can’t make them like my work either. Not that I care about being liked or about what anyone thinks about me, I’ve just been having a hard time getting passed someone thinking I was a racist. I’ve been reading old work and I don’t see how anyone could make that assumption. Some followers assured me I’m not coming off as one, and those who personally know me even laughed in my face for letting such a silly thing get to me.

I mentioned earlier making #ShyTalk as a way of getting to know me and you wouldn’t be download-68able to do so if I changed my style of writing. I post randomly and don’t have a set schedule, I’m the same when it comes to work as well. My writing can go from G to X rated anytime without warning, and it’s the same way when talking to me in person. We could be talking about the pastor’s sermon and somehow end up talking about the crudest, most risque topic ever. You never know what I’m going to say next and our conversation could go from 0-100 in no time. My mom doesn’t speak any better and my Grandma's mouth is worse than hers and I don’t love them less for it, so why am I being hated because of it.

download-71I’m going to start assuming that those asking I tone it down either missed or  misunderstood the warning, and if in fact, they misunderstood the warning, I shouldn’t expect them to understand the purpose or material of #ShyTalk. Especially when I clarify things and I’m speaking perfect English. How could you get where I’m coming from, see things from my point of view, or even get to know me if I’m not being real? If Trump could care less about being called a racist and actually say “borderline racist” statements, then I don’t need to change a thing. Some people should grow the hell up or read  material that isn't as vulgar or opinionated. We're not children, grown up cuss sometimes, get over it.

I feel a lot better like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders making me want to write more. LOL

Published by ShylahBoss Lee