This is part2/3 of my manic episodes:

So I’m sitting at my cubicle at work when all of a sudden I start hearing these voices talking to me. It wasn’t my phone, it wasn’t people around me it was literally like people were screaming at me inside my head. They’re telling me to go places, so I think I’m on some sort of mission and I have to obey. My friends at work tell me to lie down; they can tell something is not right so I decide to go to my car. I then turn on the radio and this is when the voices start racing at high altitudes. Suddenly I loose complete control of myself, it’s like I’ve been put into a bad trance and I cannot wake up. So I put the car into drive and I just go, leave work and do not return (again something I would never normally do). At first I have no idea where I’m going it felt like someone over took my body and was driving for me. The radio started talking to me, so I followed the signs on the road and listened.  I glanced at anything that seemed of importance, I knew I shouldn’t have been on the road but I couldn’t stop once I started. I came across a truck with an emblem on the back of it that I seemed to recognize so I thought I better obey and follow. Turns out I followed the truck right into a private property which happened to be a horse farm. It was beautiful, the sun was shining and for some reason I was excited like I had found my destination and the mission was near completion.

            The boy I thought I was in love with at the time kept on talking to me, I kept hearing his voice on the radio that was turned on in one of the barnyards. I wanted to see him so badly. So I kept listening to him and trying to find him, I thought he was hiding and had some big surprise for me, which made my high even higher if that’s even possible. Next thing you know it starts pouring rain, so instead of grabbing cover I start dancing and galloping in the rain. It felt like I was inside a movie. I watched a man in a hoodie walk across the path and I though it was the boy I loved so I started to chase him, turns out it wasn’t him so I continued dancing. That is exactly what manic episodes are like they do not seem real, you feel like you’re in a fantasy world with no escape route. I felt so high I didn’t even know what to do I was ecstatic about life like everything was finally falling into place. Until the cop car and ambulance show up to ruin the party. I’ve been wandering these grounds for hours, had barely any food in my system and was beyond thirsty. They kept on asking me these questions but I couldn’t respond any coherent sentence at that point. They checked my vitals but could not figure out what was wrong with me. So the cops put me under arrest and threw me into the back of a cop car figuring I was just trespassing and on drugs when little did they know I was meant to be there for my mission. They wouldn’t give me the time of day to understand I knew I was meant to be there, I got this feeling of confusion all over my body. I didn’t know how I got here or what I was doing all I knew was that I needed help.

            I was taking to the hospital where I was finally given some water, thank goodness. And from then I was transferred to one room to the next, finally into a psychiatric ward where I was put on meds to bring down the high. The problem with bipolar manic attacks is that once you’ve reached your high you come down way low, into a depressive state. It can take months even years before you find your happy medium again. No matter how much I hated being medicated it was more dangerous to my well being to have episodes, therefore giving me no choice in the scenario. All that’s left is lots of rest and therapy visits and lots of patience before you can even find you again.

Published by Shann Steffan