Backstory: For the past two years, I've attended a church and I've formed relationships that weren't healthy. In the light of this, I've made friends have helped me break free from this church. This is what I wish to tell my friends who have remained at this church.

My church.

You, my friends, are my church. The people I worship with, the people I pray with, the people I fast with.

On the outside, you are perfect, the shining image of a church on a hill. I mean, you are literally on a hill, but that's besides the point.
There is brokenness in the church, in the leadership, in your people.
There is a brokenness that won't be healed until you accept the fact that there is brokenness in the church.

As hard as it may be for you to hear this, my friends, you are the abusive church.
You don't seem to understand the unhealthiness of the mentorship in the leadership.
You don't seem to understand that this is not normal. It's not what mentorship should look like.

Mentors should no impact on what clothes to wear, my friends. They are there and should be there to give you advice regarding moral and biblical situations. They have no authority given to them by God, to tell you what to feel and how to feel it. My friends, it is NOT sin to not follow their advice.

My friends, they may tell you that I'm a bad influence. They may tell you I don't deserve your friendship because I am ungodly, I am sinful, I am broken, I refuse to heal and I refuse to break down my walls.

Is it not God's job to heal me? Is it not God's job to break down my walls? Is it or is it not God's job to show me HIS will for me? Were we not all born into sinful nature? Once I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior, I live in Christ and Christ lives in me. 

Then why are your "mentors" being the messenger of God? A messenger of God already came to Earth. He died on the cross, rose again on the third day and ascended into Heaven.
Jesus dying on the cross was the way for us, as sinners, to communicate directly to God because Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice.

My friends, when we tell our mentors our problems and ask for advice, it should be confidential. It should not reach the ears of another mentor and/or leader. The entire church leadership should not know about it.

I pray that the mentors see what they are doing is wrong.
I pray that you are healed from this. You don't see how broken you are, but I pray that you are healed.
I pray that the church start making changes.
I pray that you, my friend, overcome this and come out stronger.

I pray that you will be able to become a non-abusive church and break this cycle of hurting people.
I pray this for you because I still care.

Despite the leaders telling you that I'm a bad influence in your life, I pray that you still trust me. I pray that you still value our friendship enough to come to me if you need a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold.

I plan on pursuing Jesus in another church who supports me and values me as a member. I need and want to thrive in a church, not be oppressed, not be forgotten.

I made it out barely alive, my friend. I just hope you do too.

Published by Jenny :)