So I went out again last night. I don't honestly know why I did, I had the option of a work night out going on some ghost tour or go hang out with a bunch of sweaty hormonal teens for a few hours, get lousy sleep and feel like death for the next day. 

I wouldn't say I hate them, hate is a strong word. They're definitely fun in the fact that I get to talk to people I don't normally talk to, have fun, dance and not really give a fuck. But just continuously last night I kept getting this weird feeling I'd be having more fun, sitting on my couch and reading a fire book. As with other areas of my life I keep looking over it and how I could have more fun. I have great moments where I'm just laughing with some people and the jokes are getting cracked out and it's great, then I move off onto the next group. So in a weird way I think my issue is commitment, I never spend a whole night with just one group and don't form any real long-lasting connections. Perhaps that's what I'll try next time but I don't know if I'll bother going out for a long time. The whole getting drunk thing was awful and being kinda sober whilst fun is still just kinda weird and not the funnest thing I could be doing with my time. 

So maybe it is time to transcend the teenage need to be stuck in a room with your sweaty peers drinking brain poison and just sat in my front room with a science book. 

Or perhaps like every other time I've said this I'll just end up going to the next party, hoping things have changed since the last time. 

Published by Kevin Li