Monday: Today your physio compared me to your pelvic floor, my handles your ligaments, my body your bladder. It's given me a complex, am I that stretched I wee myself regularly?

 

Tuesday: The leather around my straps is coming undone, you fixed it with sellotape, now I feel cheap. A cheap handbag with a weeing complex.

 

Wednesday: You forgot all about me today, you only take your iPhone out now cause it has eftpos card slots. I'm depressed and bored. A depressed, bored, cheap handbag with a weeing complex

 

Thursday: You were scratching around for a few gold coins and decided to clean me out you found;

A pair of grippy socks for your ballet class

A million bobby pins

10 tampons

7 pieces of Lego

6 chewing gum wrappers

That gift voucher you keep meaning to spend

Pain killers

Pens that don't work

iPhone chargers

Your favourite pink lipstick with no lid

A dog treat

Weirdly no money.

A poor, depressed, bored, cheap handbag with a weeing complex.


 

Friday: You let your youngest child play with me, when she thought no one was looking she used all your tampons for bullets in the nerf gun. She then left me on the floor in the rumpus room. It’s cold.

A cold, poor, depressed, bored, cheap handbag with a weeing complex.

 

Saturday: I'm still on the floor. I’m lonely.

A lonely, cold, poor, depressed, bored, cheap handbag with a weeing complex.


 

Sunday: The dog took pity on me. After chewing on my fraying leather bits for a while she dragged me out to the kitchen. You hung me back up in my spot over the aluminium window handles.

When you were cooking dinner i watched you twerking in front of your reflection in the oven doors. I’m disturbed.

A disturbed, lonely, cold, poor, depressed, bored, cheap handbag with a weeing complex.