The other morning I was sleepily strolling around the hour with frizzy hair, faded pajama bottoms and an old nursing tank top. My husband very sincerely said to me, "You are a natural beauty." Every ounce of me wanted to list reasons in refutation, but instead I just said, "Thank you." 

It has been said that Real humility builds up; false humility tears down. We may not always be conscious of this, as the stereotypical of some one with "false humility" is typically a narcissist who pretends to be ignorant of the praise he's receiving. However, it seems counterintuitive to accept compliments while trying to exercise humility. A professor once told me that humility is like looking in a mirror, which enables us to ee our faults, but should also enable us to recognize our strengths too. Humility is being faced with the truth about ourselves. The truth is, my husband thinks I'm gorgeous, otherwise I doubt he'd have signed up to look at my every day, for the rest of his life. To tear down his compliment isn't helpful, but rather accepting it is what maintains the humility and honesty in our relationship. 

It can feel awkward to receive a compliment, especially if a person is highlighting a strength you've never seen in yourself before. As a receiver of a complement, you job is actually quite simple: receive it as is. A compliment accepted shows respect and gratitude to the person who gave it to you. It is like receiving a gift. If some one gave you a gift and your response was to tell them you were going to return it or list the things that were wrong with it, that would be seen as rude, and perhaps even snobbish and proud. I've learned that it is the same, though often less recognizable, in refusing a compliment. 

Like a gift, you can share your compliment with others. For example, "The project was so successful because it was a group effort. I couldn't have done it without my team." This is clearly a response that builds upon the original compliment, reflects honesty in the single person who received the compliment and chose to highlight others who contributed, and its truly humble. 

I've decided to make it apart of my new years resolution to humbly accept compliments instead of constantly negating them. Do you feel uncomfortable getting praise? 

Published by Samantha Motto