I recently went to an intervention of sorts and it was the perfect example of beating our heads against the wall. The person made it perfectly clear that he thought he had everything under control, he was never going to drink again, and he didn't need professional help.

Everyone else disagreed, but what could any of us do. Even if his parents made him go see someone chances are high it wouldn't do any good because he wouldn't do what he needed to do. I think we sometimes forget that no one can do the changing for us, or the fixing.

It's a long, hard process that has to start from within. So until he gets to the point of accepting that he needs help and there's no shame in that, there's not much anyone else can do except wait, watch, and hopefully help him before it gets bad again.

All in all it was a very humbling experience for me because I have a tendency to think I have all the answers.

I don't - no one does. After being angry and frustrated for a few hours, I decided maybe it's a good not to have all the answers. It takes some of the pressure off, you know. I can't save everyone so I can't judge anyone. Lord knows I have plenty of my own demons and vices.

I started this post because I wanted to rant and rave and vent some of my frustration. But then I realized I just wanted to make some sense of what had happened and there wasn't really any reason to stay angry and frustrated. In the end we came together as a family and, I think, demonstrated that this person has options and a support network that maybe he didn't think he had before. 

It's a start...

I would love to hear from anyone who has dealt with this before and has some suggestions.

Published by Cathy Langer