Lately I have been feeling tired and borderline exhausted sometimes. its not anything special that has happened, its just the way life sometimes is. We are still trying to sell our house without any success so far, I need to come up with money to pay impatient web providers for the ministry and I have had an invasion of cats at night disturbing my sleep. On top of this we have the steady stream of impatient collection agencies writing, e.mailing and texting me trying to encourage us to pay. And believe me, if we had the money, we would have payed a long time ago.

Life is not always they way it is portrayed in movies, or not even the way the Christian church tells us it should be. But then again I do not believe the apostle Paul would agree with most of the preaching being done today.

A look at Pauls life would quickly label him as a weak Christian if we where to use most of the standards from todays preaching. His life was not successful filled with favor. His life was not easy, he was stoned and left for dead. Several times he had nothing to eat, he almost froze to death on several occasions and he was about to drown in a ship wreck. He feared, worried and was convinced this was it, now he was about to loose his life. People hated him and his preaching was the source of that hate.

But a look at our Lords life would also quickly label Him as a weak Christian, if we where to judge using most of the standards from todays preaching. He was thirsty, He was hungry, He was lonely, He experienced great fear.

So who is right then? Are we supposed to live the victorius Christian life where everybody loves us, accepts us, gives us favor? Or are we to live the “defeated” life of Paul the Apostle and even our Lord Jesus Christ?

The biblical truth is this, todays preaching that promises us  a “victorious” Christian life is a lie. The true victorious Christian life is sometimes very hard, sometimes very challenging and sometimes you will feel borderline exhausted. But it is filled with the victorious knowledge our lives are no longer our responsibility. And that is the tipping point of our lives that makes our lives truly victorious.

This is the key the Apostle Paul had grasped, the one key he understood that actually made his life a truly victorious Chrisitan life. He knew his life was no longer his responsibility because he knew our Lord Jesus Christ had bought him,  payed for him with His blood. He knew he was the property of Jesus Christ, a slave of Jesus Christ and he knew he could trust his Lord to take good care of him.

The true life of a believer does not consists of continued victories with guaranteed healing, guaranteed overflow of money, guaranteed protection against all evil. But the true life of a believer promises us that we do not need to worry, we do not even need to plan for tomorrow. Why? Because we belong to our Lord Jesus Christ, and He has already made the plans for tomorrow. But the best part is this, because we belong to Him He has bought with His Blood everything we need for life and living.

When He bought us, payed for us and we became His property, He made sure His Blood payed for everything. His Blood payed for our reconciliation to God, for our health, for our money, for our every need we might experience in this life. He wants the world to know He is a good Lord, and He wants the world to know His slaves are living the good life just because they belong to Him.

Allow me to sidetrack for a moment. He did not purchase us from satan. When He bought us, His Blood payed what we owe to God not what we owe to satan. But because we owed a debt we could not pay to God, we where given over to satan before we where saved and bought with His blood.

So why then am I still sick if He is such a good Lord? Why then did my mother die of cancer when I prayed, prayed and prayed but she still died? Why then have I no money right now to pay my bills?

I know how you might feel. Sometimes life is not fair, sometimes life sucks big time. And sometimes people die, even slaves of Lord Jesus Christ. When it comes to death, think of it this way. Death is a good thing for a Christian, after all when we die we get to leave this earth and be with our Lord for an eternity. We get to be free from this world, free from sickness and sin once and for all and we get to walk the streets of gold in heaven. I have been to heaven, its wonderful beyond description. And if it was up to me, I would go back right now. So we are not to fear death, we are not even to be sad when somebody who was a slave of our Lord dies. We know they are in a better place, and we know we will see them again.

But what about our immediate needs? You need healing now, you need money now. Why does the Lord not answer your prayers?

The Bible says in Deut 28:1-13, Rom 8:32, Rom 8:1-11, Ps 35:27 that the Lord wants us healed and wealthy. The Lord has no pleasure in us being sick and needy. He wants us healed and wealthy so that we can be able to do His work, to bring souls into the Kingdom.

So why then am I still sick and needy?

To answer that question I need to ask a question. What is most important in your life right now? Is it your needs or your relationship to your Lord?

How would you feel it if your children where more concerned about their needs then your love for them? If all they ever thought about, talked about was their need for clothes, food and security but they never ever talked about how much you love them or what you mean to them? I guess you would feel disapointed and a little hurt. And you would know you could not meet their needs right away, because it is obvious they have a more pressing need and that is to be secure in your love for them. And when they are secure in your love for them, then you would be free to meet their needs.

The Lord is no different from us. He hears us talking about, thinking about, dreaming about, worrying about what we need and how we will get it. He hears our prayers about our need for healing, money, deliverance and He knows we struggle to trust Him for these things. He knows there are a way more pressing need in our lives right now, and that is to be firmly grounded in His love for us. And He has even said in His own word He cant bless us until we are firmly grounded in His love. (3.John 2)

So could it be that you are sick and in need of money because you are acting like the Israelites in the desert, focused on your needs instead of your  Lord and right now He is working on getting you firmly grounded in His love?

So how do we become firmly grounded in His love?

When we stop being focused on what we need, and start focusing on what we have. And what do we have? Right now it feels like I dont have that much. I do not have the money I need, I do not have the health I need?

You do have the cross of Christ, and if you did not have anything else you would still be the richest person alive.

Consider this, you could have all the money in the world but that would give you pleasure for a lifetime. But one day, you would die and you would end up in hell for an eternity. All the money in the world could not buy you an eternity of pleasure.

The Lord wants you to know, focus upon and be thankful for one thing and one thing only. The cross of Jesus Christ, the fact that He died for your sins. When we come to that place in life where we can say “I only need Jesus dying for me on a cross and then I am happy”, then He will know we are firmly grounded in His love. (3.John 2)

So what this all comes down to is this, it is a matter of trust. It is a choice to trust Jesus dying for you as being enough for your life. It is a choice to trust in Jesus death on  a cross as being the only thing you need.

When you make that choice, you open up the entire Bible and all its promises of healing, provision, deliverance (Deut 28:1-13)

Yes there will still be needs, sometimes you will get sick and sometimes it might feel like you are about to die. Sometimes you will have no money and dont know what you are going to eat. But you will know this, that you are a slave of our Lord Jesus christ because of your decision to trust in Him dying for you on a cross and your decision to be satisfied with that.

When you are satisfied with the cross, He will give you everything else you need for this life. For He is a good Lord who wants to provide for you, heal you. He wants you wealthy and healthy so you are free to do His work on earth.

Have you ever truly read Matth 6:25-34?

Have you noticed what it says? It says we are not to worry about a thing, but why are we not to worry? Because He knows what we need before we even know it ourself.

If you are satisified with the cross, He has promised to take responsibility for your life. He our Lord Jesus Christ has promised to give us what we need, and He has even said we dont even have to ask for anything. He already knows what we need, He only expects one thing from us, and that is to be satisfied with the cross.

So it becomes obvious to us the victorious Christian life does not guarantee freedom from hardships. It does not guarantee freedom from worrying, fears, sickness, death, hate and persecution. But what it does guarantee is this:

Freedom from having responsibility for our own lives, because we are satisfied with the cross.

For some of us, we will be called into trials and tribulations similar to the Apostle Paul. For some of us, we will be called into trials and tribulations of sickness, death, poverty. For some of us, life will be easier and not that eventful. But we all have this in common, we can face what ever is coming, secured in the knowledge He will take responsibility for our needs and our lives, as long as we are satisfied with the cross.

Let me repeat myself, as long as you are satisfied with the cross you will not have to worry about anything. No matter what happens, He your Lord knows what is coming and when it comes, He will give you what you need.

Just be satisfied with the cross.

I look at my own life, and I see this being true. I have learned to be satisfied with the cross and we have been blessed with a beautiful apartment. We have been blessed with a real estate agent that seems to know what he is doing. We have been blessed with enough money each day to buy what we need to live, there has always been food on the table. We have been blessed with a good car we can borrow from family members until we get the money to buy our own.

Sure we have needs, sure I need money to pay for the expenses for this ministry and sure we still have a HUGE debt we need to pay of.

But in all of this I have learned to be satisfied with the cross. And because I am satisfied with the cross I know my Lord Jesus Christ has the solution to this. And when the time is right, He will tell me what to do on how to get out of debt and have all our needs met.

Until then, I choose to be satisfied with the cross. because I am a slave of my Lord Jesus Christ and He is a good Lord.

Published by Apostle Ernie apostleernie@outlook.com