The love of a woman to a man, as a man to a woman

Body to body, breath to breath. The way he made her feel way back when.

Oh he was her heart’s desire, her body stayed on fire for him.

He burned a spot in her heart and soul.

She was to busy being foolish, stupid and blind to see he would never be more than he was too her.

To know he had one special person in his life and it was not her.

He never told her that, showed her that, she had no choice but to see.

Everyone takes a portion in their life to soul search. She found who she was, and still searching, finding and discovering new things about herself everyday,

Things he will never know of.

She is alone, she made it that way. Alone she was better, safer, stronger, and  will succeed on her own better and faster

okay with accepting this for herself in life, she made it this way

When a person finds that one they want for life and they see they can’t have them,

only after giving herself completely in ways she never thought she would give herself to any one person. she gave Emotionally, Spiritually And Sexually.

Doing all so they never forget and never leaves but forgetting this one thing.

Maybe he will never leave her, but at the same time he will never completely be hers.

One day you realize he was never really with you, so how could he leave?

After she wipes away the tears that never seem to go away or stop.

It’s at that moment she realizes, it never was what she wanted it to be.

Nor, will it ever be anything more than nothing

She cannot make love from nothing, so how did she love him?

All that she gave of herself, “Wasted” time.

Although she tried to put others in his place, it never worked.

Not one man could ever be him, as imperfect as he may have been to her at the end of it all, truth be told, not one man can ever be him.

Don’t know why he had her like he did. To not break herself free from this never-ending cycle. Cycle of feeling empty and alone, although he said he loves her.

She now knows it’s not true. At least not the way she loved him.

Don’t try to make her think she was more than  she  really was, life showed her different and she believe life over him.

If he saw her tears would he feel ashamed for her, or for himself? Would he embrace her in my time of need? She needed him at one time. He was the one in her heart, but he was not there.

All her fears went away. Now in her heart she loves herself. So she thinks if she made it this far, the rest should go smoothly. Allowing herself to see and believe he loved her and for that she blame herself.

When she got to a certain point and the pain started to get dull.

That is when she would start to see clearly, all the things she did not see before.

She was at that point for a long time, but since that time she can now say she is truly wonderful inside and out.

Once so close, or she thought, they spent a lot of time together but more time apart. They never did anything and never went anywhere, but with him she always enjoyed herself. So how did she loose the part of him she had such a tight hold on?

She found herself that is how.

For her to get him was a struggle a true challenge and she cherished him because too her he was worth it. Now she see’s him as a lesson learned, and although it has many years since. She now knows, she can love and truly be loved back. Life goes on whatever the situation or the pain, life goes on. Time changes and nothing remains the same. So now she sees she thought he was a friend too her, but the truth be told he were nothing more than a memory in the making.

One day, one day, she will find that true friend to be everything to her, with a sincere heart and truthful words, with actions that are honest and real.

One day she will know love again, because through him, she knows what love isn’t!

Published by Josephine Conde