As far back as I can remember, I have been mentally and emotionally abused by my parents. At an early age I was told I would never amount to anything and they took a great pleasure in using love to manipulate me. As long as I did what they wanted me to do I was loved, but when I wanted to do something they did not agree upon they quickly told me I was no longer their son if I did not obey them. This instilled in me a great fear, a fear of loosing my parents and a fear of not being loved. I quickly learned I was worthy of love as long as I behaved.

Our society today values true self confidence and positive self image. The self made man or woman who confident walks along life with an almost stoic reaction to lives challenges is what we all want to be. All little boys want to grow up to be Clint Eastwood, tough, not moved by lives circumstances but most of all confident.

This has even crept into christianity where we see a strong emphasize on topics like “your best life now”, “this is your time”. With the influence of the world, we have a now a christianity with a god that is reduced to a life coach. He is no longer God and Lord, God has become your buddy, your life coach cheering you along and his greatest goal in life is to make sure you have great self confidence,  and a positive self image. Sin has even been reduced to the idea of not appreciating yourself and not loving yourself.

But the fact of the matter is this, Jesus did not come to give us a good self image or a true self confidence. Jesus came to reconcile us to God because we have sinned, we have broken the 10 commandments by choice. So we are guilty as charged.

So we can conclude one thing, the jesus that has been reduced to a life coach is not the Jesus of the Bible. The jesus that has become your buddy, your coach, cheering you along encouraging you to find your best life now because now is your time, is not the Jesus of the Bible. And if it is not the jesus of the Bible there is only one option left, its demonic.

We humans are sinners. We have chosen to break the 10 commandments. We did not lie because of an accident. We chose to lie the first time we did it, and then it became more and more natural to us so we do not even consider it a sin any longer as an adult. But that does not change the fact that is is a sin to lie. Sin is never an accident, its choice. But the fact of the matter is this, we are unable to choose not to sin. And this is the reason why Jesus came, because we keep on choosing sin and we need reconciliation to God.

God will never force us to be reconciled to Him. We have the ability to choose, and He will respect our choice if we want nothing to do with Him. But one day you will die, and that day God will be justified when He passes sentence on you and sentences you to serve out your punishment for your sins in hell. It will be an eternity you will have to serve your sentence for your sins in hell, and hell is a real place.

But what happens when we choose to be reconciled to God?

To understand this you first have to understand who you are.

You are not a physical body, you are a spirit having a human experience. One day God created you and He gave you a physical body. One day He will decide its time for you to leave this earth, on that day your physical body will die and you will be held accountable for everything you did while you had your human experience. If you are reconciled to God through faith in Jesus Christ`s death for you on a cross, you will be welcomed home to heaven and live for ever in the presence of a loving God. If you are not reconciled to God through faith in Jesus Christ`s death for you on a cross, you will be judged by a holy God and sent to hell for an eternity.

But what happens if you where to choose to believe Jesus died for your sins?

As a physical human being you can not travel back in time to the time when Jesus was crucfied for your sins. But you are not your physical body. You are a spirit living inside of a physical body. And God is a spirit.  When you believe Jesus died for your sins, God sees it as if your spirit becomes one with Jesus on the cross. So God sees it as if it is you who are crucified on the cross.

You do not become Jesus, you are not crucified, Jesus is still the one who is crucified. But spiritually you become one with Jesus.

Jesus who is God is also a spirit. He created for Himself a physical body to sacrifice Himself in for our sins. When He died He died a physical death for our sins. HIs  body died, but of He did not die spiritually because a spirit can not die. So God did not die spiritually on the cross, He died physically.

You are a spirit, so you wil never die. But your physical body on the other hand will die one day.

When you choose to believe Jesus died for your sins you will become one with His Spirit. Spiritually you will be hanging on the cross with Jesus when He died 2000 years ago. You might feel tempted to ask how is that possible. But remember this, God is God and the fact that He is God gives Him permission to do what He wants and how He wants. He is under no obligation to explain how He does things to us. And because we are not God we just have to accept some thing even if we dont understand them.

So what happens when you believe Jesus died for your sins is this, you become one with Jesus.  When we talk about believing in Jesus dying for your sins, this is what we are talking about. That because of your faith you are spiritually dead with Christ on the cross.

So remember this, you are a spirit and you will never die. You are a spirit having a human experience, and one day, your creator who gave you your physical body will take your physical body away from you. That die you will die a physical death. While you where here on earth you chose to do things God considers to be sin. You chose to lie, you chose to steal, you chose to hate. And for that and the rest of your sins you as a spirit will one day be held accountable to God. You have two choices, one day die and be sentenced by God to be punished for your sins in hell for an eternity. Or become one with the Spirit of Jesus Christ who died for your sins, and was punsihed instead of you.

This oneness with Christ that can only come through your faith in Him dying for your sins, is what reconciles you to God. But reconciliation to God is not the only thing you recieve as a result of this oneness with Jesus.

You will become one with everything He has. He his health, provision, wisdom, guidance, joy, peace. But to have a part of this, you must first die with Him on the cross through faith in what He did for you. So if you need health He has it, if you need money, He has a ton of money. But to get your hands on it, you will first have to die spiritually by believingin Jesys dying for your sins.

There is one other thing you will get to share in, and that is His self image and His self confidence.

This is a type of self image and self confidence that cant be affected by outward circumstances. But to share in HIs self confidence and self image, you will have to die spiritually by faith in what Jesus did for you.

So the Jesus of the Bible came to give you everything you need, including a good self image and self confidence. But the road to a good healthy self image, and a good healthy self confidence is through spiritual death from faith in what Jesus did for you at the cross.

This is how we can know the life coaching jesus, and the buddy jesus who is cheering you on and telling you to believe in yourself is not the Jesus of the Bible. The jesus telling you to love yourself, accept yourself is not the Jesus of the Bible. The jesus telling you he wants you to succeed and have favor with men, is not the jesus of the bible.

The Jesus of the Bible wants you to have good health, wealth, a healthy self image and a healthy self confidence. But He is telling you to die so that He can give you these things. He is telling you to die spiritually by believing He died for your sins, and then and only then, will He give you these things and more.

I was mentally and emotionally abused by my parents. They never instilled in me a good self confidence or self image. Instead I learned to fear and I learned not to express what I wanted in fear of loosing them. I was not allowed to have a self will at home.

After leaving home at the age of 20 I quickly learned I had to build up my self confidence. It is tough when you have been abused all your life, and suddenly you are going to make it on your own. I tried everything to build up my self confidence and self image, buddhism, new age. I tried the buddy jesus, the life coach jesus and nothing helped. I tried psychology, self talk, positive thinking. And it worked for a while until something happened that destroyed my newly found self confidence and self image.

It was not until I died spiritually by believing Jesus died for my sins I found a healthy self confidence and self image.

If you want to have a good healthy self image and self confidence you will first have to die by choosing to believe Jesus died for your sins. That is the only way because the cross never changes.

The world may change, you will be exposed to several different challenges. But no matter what happens, you can look to the cross of Christ to see how much you are loved and to draw from His strength to accomplish the things you need to do. He has given you everything in His death, and you have access to everything as long as you are one with Him by faith.