Tis the time of year when you turn on the TV and run into some sort of family Christmas classic. Everything from cartoons, to claymation, to a sappy Hallmark made for TV film, and of course a 24 hour period devoted entirely to a dysfunctional family and one boy with a wild imagination (I speak of none other than The Christmas Story which is an institution among Christmas classics).  Of course if you are a fan of Charles Dicken’s, A Christmas Carol, which has been turned into countless versions, then this is definitely the season for you. It’s a Wonderful Life, Bill Murray's comedic take in Scrooged, and the Disney cartoon 3D version with the simple title of A Christmas Carol where Scrooge is portrayed by Jim Carrey to mention just a few.

I recall specifically the year when Disney released A Christmas Carol in theaters, it was the winter of 2009. It was the last movie my father ever saw with me and my family. He passed away a few days before Christmas that year and I can recall the last of many moments like it was yesterday. But in this instance I recall specially how much he enjoyed that particular movie. He was enthralled with the 3D effects, he felt like the snowflakes were falling all around him.  He smiled like a child and like most things in his life, he reveled in new experiences and took pleasure in pretty much everything he did.

Not more than a few days later, losing him like we did was devastating and completely unexpected. He wasn’t sick. He never showed signs of being ill. He just sat down one night after work and like in some Hallmark film he just died. I keep wondering when the really great stuff would happen like in all those sappy movies, but perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself. I needed to have my video-montage first.

It’s been seven years and yes, I still wonder when the really great stuff will happen, but as the Christmas season began this year wouldn’t you guess, the very first Christmas movie I ran upon was a Disney version of A Christmas Carol. Now the irony of seeing this movie isn’t lost on me. As I sit here and reflect back over the years since that fateful day when I lost the most important man in my life. For you see, like Scrooge, I visit my ghosts; first the past with a reflection of remorse for things I should have done differently, but also joy for wonderful memories that I will always treasure. I then look around me I’m so grateful for what I have present in my life. When I look towards the future I know how short life really is and fate can be cruel. I try to remember every day to live in the moment and take pleasure in the small moments.

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As my video-montage comes to a close I would love sit here and wallow in the sadness that can overtake my joy at this time of year, but unlike all those movies, this is real life. I may not be able to celebrate with the man who lived his life with a joy that truly radiated from his being, but I want to live each day as if it were my last. Celebrate it with passion and joy. Celebrate who I am and not be afraid.

Tis the season. So celebrate everyone

Published by Kay Daniels