Imagine the following:

You meet a guy at a bar, while hanging out with some friends. You strike up a conversation and you quickly discover he has his act together and he is very mature; not like those other losers, you've been dating up until now.

Like every other woman out there, you will at some point begin to wonder if you're good enough for him.


You've been friends with this guy for some time now and you're really into him but unfortunately, you're in the dreaded friend-zone, so you're trying to figure out how you could possibly make him see you could be the perfect girlfriend for him, instead of “just” being his friend.


You've been dating your boyfriend for a while but things aren't going as well as you are hoping. You can feel him slipping away a little bit, every day. You feel like everything you do makes the relationship worse and you desperately want to make things better, but you just don’t know how.

Does any one of the above situations sound familiar to you? The good news is, whatever your specific situation, with the following tips, you can turn things around and work on making things a lot better:

1. Reclaim Your Time

This might sound counterproductive but you need to start doing things for yourself and stop focusing so much on your man.

Yes, you want to show him that you really care about him by texting him, calling him and making plans with him.

There is nothing wrong with that, in general. But take a step back and analyze the situation. Are you investing more time into the relationship than he is?

Reclaim your time by working on yourself. This way, it won't feel like your life has stalled simply because you were trying to prove yourself to someone. Besides, when you work on yourself, you will learn to appreciate yourself and you will always be radiating positive vibes. No guy can resist that.

So take up that self-defense class you've been meaning to sign up for or write that business plan for your startup. Get that haircut you've always wanted. Go on vacation to your dream destination with your friends. In short - Love yourself!

2. Bump - up Your Value

If diamonds were in high supply, they probably wouldn't carry as much value. It is basic psychology -the scarcer something is, the more valuable it becomes to us.

Following this very concept, try and make yourself more “valuable” to him by not being too available. Let him wonder why you have not replied to his text message in the last two hours.

Let him wonder why you haven't returned his call yet. Let him know that you will not always be available whenever it's convenient for him to hang out.

Now, I’m not saying that you should give him the cold shoulder because he might think you're not interested. Also, following this approach is not meant to make him worry about losing you as a partner. Instead, you have to balance it out such that you make him invest in you.

So instead of cancelling plans at the drop of a hat whenever he asks you out, tell him you already made plans and suggest to him another time that you might be available. That way, you are not completely blowing him off and you are also showing him that he needs to make plans with you in advance because your time is valuable as well.

3. Get to know Him

How much do you really know about the person on your side? Forget about asking him where he grew up, where or with who he went to school with and any other information you can find out by simply reading his Facebook profile.

Instead, ask yourself questions like: What's he afraid of? What makes him happy? When is he most vulnerable? What does he truly desire? When a guy opens up to you, it means he feels comfortable doing so. Your main goal should be to create a comfortable environment for him to open up by opening up yourself.

Note that this is not a process that should be rushed. Instead, establish a friendship first, create a safe space and make sure he is the person you want to open up to in the first place. He might not open up to you immediately so you need to let things happen naturally.

We tend to invest emotionally in someone when we are comfortable opening up to that person. Hence, if you want to become the perfect woman for him, you have to connect with him emotionally.

4. Be his biggest Cheerleader

Being his biggest cheerleader doesn't mean cheering him on to do what he already does best. That's the same as telling a woman who already knows that she looks beautiful, that she's beautiful.

However, if she's been working hard to lose a few pounds, and he acknowledges that she has indeed lost a few pounds, that woman will appreciate the man’s compliment a lot more!

Same concept applies. If you notice your man has really been working hard on a project at work or his own personal project, acknowledge how hard working he is and show appreciation for his efforts.


Above simple tips will help you become the best possible girlfriend to him, letting your relationship grow and making him very happy with you. Make a conscious effort to work on these tips for a while, and they will become second habit to you. It will definitely pay off big time in your relationship!

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