Dating, relationships and love teach us all so much and there are so many valuable things to take from them.

Relationships, I have had some good ones and some shit ones.  I haven't been in 50 relationships but the ones I have been in taught me a lot. Relationships can be great because you basically get to go out with someone you think is really cool and you develop a really special bond in most cases.  However, you do have to commit yourself and always make sure you're on the same page.  You have to compromise and typically people hate change.  I am not against relationships at all, but I just think that there are some things we get caught up in and forget as we can get overwhelmed with a new partner.

Here is what I have learnt:

  • You are not a counselor - You cannot fix someone’s problems. People can turn to you for support and you can offer a shoulder to lean on but if their problems are serious then you have to face that it can take more than talking to you each night to fix it.  However, there is only so much we can take on and you have to remember not to take on their problems as typically we have our own to deal with. Offer a helping hand but don't stretch yourself thin.
  • You must ALWAYS put yourself first - I do not care what anyone says you have to put yourself first.  If you are unhappy, fix the problem whether it be confronting them, or breaking up you have to put yourself first. If this other person has really intense issues and you find it is too much get out of there. Don't leave them for dead but make sure you're still not putting all that extra pressure on yourself.
  • If someone does not treat you right they are so not worth - What is the point of dating someone if they treat you badly?  If they say things that make you upset, obviously talk to them before making rash decisions but if it keeps happening break it off.  Why commit yourself to someone who won't treat you like you want to be treated?
  • Listen to your gut - Straight up if you have a bad feeling in your gut, $10 says it's there for a reason.  If you have doubts and you're unsure it's most likely a sign that what you're doing isn't the best and you should really listen to your instincts because really, who knows you better than you?
  • Communicate - Be honest but not rude. Communication is so underrated but really if there is no communication what's the point?  In relationships you should be open and willing to share otherwise you will block the other person out before you know it.  Always talk to the other person and be upfront.

If you find the one that you're really keen on stick with it and fight if you have to. Just don't fight too hard for the wrong one. Remember that relationships are supposed to be fun and exciting and if you're feeling like your current relationship isn't working maybe check back into single life. Trust me it's not that bad ;)

I hope you enjoyed this post & hopefully you can relate. I'm trying to start posting more on here and get more of a feel for this platform. I hope you stick around with me on my journey and I can help you on yours.

Ashley x

Published by Ashley Spudtato