Originally Posted on Journeying to Motherhood Blog

 

Mothers groups…..they all start with the best intentions but seriously when a large group of women get together you are almost testing fate on how many people can get hurt in such a small amount of time!

Lets start at the beginning.

Woman gets pregnant, she meets others who are due at the same time, she relishes in the fact that she has all of these amazing new friends and lets go of some of fear that she has never been one for lots of girlfriends.

Fast forward to the birth of all the giggling babies.

Some breastfeed –  some formula feed, some start solids at 3 months – some start at 6, some are gentle parents – some do cry it out. (do you get where I’m going yet?)

Rifts become slightly visible. “so and so is judging me” “at least I’m not a sancti mummy” and separate groups seem to form.

At this stage we are under the pretense that being apart of large mums groups and support groups despite conflict is better then being with a close group, lets put our differences aside, besides we are all adults and lets just support one and other.

Then out of no where a rumor starts. Callous words spoken 100% out of context and quite embellished. Grovelling apologies arise despite not actually saying what is said you have spoken and your left trying to pick up the pieces shattered by childish behavior.

Just like that friendships are torn into shreds, tears are shed and sides are taken, you are left wondering: what the heck is wrong with women and why do some people insist on causing problems just for the fun of it?

Now I am not a meek and mild person, I pride myself in being honest and self aware so I understand that your not always going to be best friends with everybody (especially women) but in this case it knocked me for six.

Chinese whispers, Gossiping, He said She said and Backstabbing are now l terms that I associate with Mothers Groups, but I have learnt to be kind yet calculating with my words (besides the fact I’m sure this blog post will probably be turned into a massive “Oh my goodness look what she has written about…what a bitch”) never say something that someone can turn against you because hey we are all adults (PS that was a joke) if you feel the need to bitch or gossip tell your mum, because she will never tell anyone else, and always remember my sin isn’t any worse then yours – you may not like everything that someone else does, says or acts but you are guaranteed that they in turn don’t like everything you do, say or act the best way to deal with these feelings is to just keep them to yourself because just as the old saying goes.

“If you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all.”

And on that note, I’m done.

C x

Published by Caitlin Griffin