You wouldn’t know it

if you never really looked

at her like I do.

Not everyone walks around

and takes pictures of flowers

digital snapshots

of vivid memories.

She changes with the seasons

Seems to flow with the breeze

She’s an apathetic queen

Driven by misery shes only seen.

She won’t let anyone in

It must be too damp

Or corroded

Or too cramped for her style

She’s used to being used

And sadness is just another word

Alone is not a description

Its just an existence.

 

It’s not my fault you don’t

feel the love I give

You don’t have to do this alone

And you never have

But you get what you give.

I have watched you walk away

Too many times to care

about the broken bones from

holding yourself too tight.

You survived and keep surviving

And all you care about is survival

I care about caring

Hugging ghostly corpses

And trying to find you in crowded bars

looking at the backs of heads in dim light

I’m starting to choke on the thick puffs

I’m starting to think none of this

Was ever worth it.

Published by Eli Williams