I remember jotting this down over my phone as part of my memory lane journal when I was at my fourth month back in 2014 here in Singapore.  And while staying at a nearby hotel in this area, it still gives back the same vibe as how the clear weather and serenity of the area felt like 2 years back. Enjoy reading.


Today marks my 4th month of living and striving abroad. Somehow being alone became my moment of solace where I walk half asleep and my imaginations are all but mine. Sitting peacefully on a bench in a park nearby at Balliester road with the wind blowing and the autumn skyline up ahead... a peace I have always wanted. Finally I'm tuning out all the bad vibes. Finally I can all be myself. I can get the concentration I needed.  As my housemates have always told me... they took too much of my attention... and now I don't want to give any of it to them. This time should be more to myself. This time its all bout myself. That was my reason all along for leaving all behind.


Back then I can already make a living. Back there I have painful memories.  Back there, this scar kept me human. Here I can live again. Here I can be alive. Here I struggle past what I have achieved before. Here I can dream for more. Somehow I regret not coming here when I was much younger. When I can take all the risks of adventure.  Back then I was too much in love that I only see the world around my very man that I didn't notice how beautiful the world that surrounds me. I can only hope that everything is falling to its rightful place.


Its peaceful out here. Its already noon and I don't feel the warmth of the weather.  The breeze,  the serenity, cleanliness, the mellow music is what I'm engulfing. It sounds weird... well I'm weird and cynical. But to anyone who will read this.... and that is If I publish this. Try to sit and look around. .. Im still in the city yet the world around me is far more beautiful.  I sit waiting for nothing. I look up and only the clear sky greeted me. I close my eyes and I can feel the wind caressing my face.


Today marks the day that I can truly tell myself that I'm free.



Published by Sara Mae