My first experience with muteness took place in October 2009. After remaining speechless for three weeks, the doctor ordered me to follow his instructions to avoid losing my voice again. Though being committed to his orders, I wasn't emotionally happy. I resented what happened to me and I could feel bitterness in my throat. I didn't truly understand back then how our negative emotions are directly related to our physical status. After few months my voice started to fade, I would be in a middle of a discussion and I find myself voiceless or I would be in a class and find myself miming to my students instead of speaking. I knew no compromises. I insisted to carry on my duties paying no attention to my trembling voice.
One evening my husband asked me for a private talk. "Tomorrow will be your last working day. Meet your Head and inform her that you won't continue the school year." We were in March. I had my students, my units and my projects. I rejected, objected, rebelled, cried and he didn't respond. He insisted and this was something totally new to me. I knew my partner as a civilised man who had never forced me to do anything.
I went to work next day and sobbed in my meeting with my Head. She assured me that she will manage my classes till I'm back and that my husband, whom she knew personally, is doing this for my mere good. I was so angry at him that I couldn't see anything positive in the situation. And now I admit that it was one of the main events that positively affected my life.
This is another lesson that I had learned. Sometimes we need to care for our beloved ones more than they care for themselves. Sometimes we must rescue them from themselves. Love sometimes must be tough.
Read the intro to this series of articles at:
Published by Iman Refaat