How Turning Mute Made Me Better Not Bitter #Lesson 14

Before facing my vocal cords problem and taking my sickness leave from work my life was so busy. Socially busy. I had friends at work with whom I used to hang out during weekends and to chat regularly on weekdays. I had colleagues who filled my life with insights from professional and personal experiences. And I had amazing students who nurtured my heart and challenged my mind to always try its best. 
During my sickness leave all this completely changed. I found myself surrounded by my family and my best friend. I received text messages from some friends and colleagues, and emails from few students. At first I felt lonely and angry at the rest for forgetting to ask about me. Their care wasn't up to my expectations and I doubted that they loved me from the first place. I started to categorise people based on the level of attention they paid me during my absence. I sorted them into acquaintances, colleagues, friends and close friends. And I made a mental decision that I would show each one the same level of care she embraced me with. 
After many months I figured out how mistaken I was. With one of my friends getting sick and my life being super busy; trying to find my balance back, I wasn't able to offer her the level of care she expected and though I sincerely wished to support her. 
This experience taught me many lessons. I understood that I must have no expectations from anyone because I can never know what people are going through. That many people wish to be more caring and more supportive yet they stumble and screw up and sometimes it's out of their hands. That sick people need emotional support. That I must never categorise people. And that the best thing I can do to be happy is to give out love not to wait to receive it. 

Published by Iman Refaat


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