Interpersonal Skills By Dr Humayun Iqbal

Interpersonal Skills By Dr Humayun Iqbal

Jul 26, 2019, 3:43:58 PM Life and Styles

Success is an attitude!

10 easy steps to become successful in just a few days.

“There is no prize for winning an argument but there is always a price to pay for it”.


Underneath few lines may change your life forever.


Interpersonal skills are far more important and rewarding than professional competence. Follow the underneath 10 simple steps to become a successful person within days.

1.    “Loosing an argument -may- win a heart” & vice versa: Remember that relationships are far more important than winning an argument & humility is the key.


2.    Clean Communication: Always use "I language", to express how you are feeling. Be assertive but not arrogant or abusive. Stay pleasant & courteous.


Never use "you language" i-e blame language. Don't say, you did this / you did that etc.  E-g: Say I felt disrespected rather than saying that you disrespected me.


3.    Remember that both of you could be right in your respective situations / backgrounds. Everything is relative. 



4.    Choose your battles; do not start defending everything you say.  Only argue on very few important principles, which really matter to you, based on logical & rational thinking. 


5.    Only argue if you honestly want to understand and clarify “yourself” about that point or principle. And just express your opinion politely along with reasons behind your thinking and that’s it, your job is done, then just listen to the other side, don't push to make them agree with you. 


You also don’t have to agree but only try to understand what the other side is saying & why. Then end pleasantly e-g by saying that “we can agree to disagree”.


6. Be generous: Respect others feelings don't try to prove them wrong even when you know you can.


7.  Anxiety is a killer - it makes you vulnerable: Tell yourself 10 times/day that you are a very calm & strong person, even if you feel that you are not. And remember that nothing is end of the world.


8.    Avoid fight and flight mode: This is an ancient human survival instinct but sometimes get switched on unnecessarily. Never lose control of your emotions, always keep your calm even in situations when your brain tells you that its life and death situation. Don't turn every situation into life and death scenario. 


9.    Delay your reaction: Don't react straightaway doesn't matter how bad you are hurt. Your brain will keep telling you to react but don't react just say to yourself that you will react after you have done a calm & rational thinking.


10. Always stay positive and have faith in God that "something good is coming your way" and no one can stop it. 


Always feel good about yourself, but do not become arrogant i-e do not think low about others. 


Every day tell “yourself” “not others” that you are not inferior to anyone. Everybody is different and God has given different strengths to everybody.


Every day count 3 things that you are grateful for & 3 kind things that you have done recently.


Conflicts are a natural phenomenon of life, you cannot avoid them in day-to-day life, because no two humans are alike but you can control how to behave in a conflict situation and avoid damage. 


A simplest yet potent test for your interpersonal skills is the number of friends you have who enjoy your company or talking to you & call you at least ones a month. If there are none & rather people are avoiding you – you need to change or seek help from a Psychiatrist before it’s too late. 

Published by john paret

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