Don’t you just love these catchy cliché’ titles I keep giving you? Too bad, I love them and I’m not sorry about it.
I would also like to preface this blog post with my current setting. I’m at a bar called Whisk n Ladle, drinking a delicious bourbon beverage tastefully named the “Figgy Pop”. I am pretty sure it’s fig bourbon. Who knew that even existed? The other important thing to note is, it’s not even 5:00 yet… it’s 4:39. Why does this matter? Why am I saying this? I am about to lead you to my next pet peeve about society, but even more so business etiquette.
Dear Employees, Salespeople and Interns,
PLEASE stop saying you’re sorry, for no reason.
This article was prompted by a visit to a store. I was walking out of the store, pushing the door open, and a woman (10 feet away from the door) stopped and said “I’m Sorry”. For what? What are you sorry for? This event immediately made me recollect an intern I had last quarter that habitually said sorry for everything. I think the point I am about to make is important for all employees, salespeople, interns and even entrepreneurs alike.
Stop saying sorry for things that do not need an apology. For some odd reason, this is totally ingrained in our culture. We apologize for everything. We apologize for maybe offending someone. We apologize for not doing something quick enough, despite not being physically able to. We apologize forEVERYTHING. To be honest, I didn’t even notice this until that intern, but because of his constant apologies, I even started self reflecting. What do I say sorry for? How does that make me look as a professional? Well, lets deduce… how did I feel about the intern?
I hate to dump on this poor guy, but I immediately didn’t trust his work. Because he apologized for everything, I just instinctually thought, he is fu*king everything up. Or else, why would he apologize all the time? I mean, if he didn’t keep up with my gait as I walked, he apologized… Seriously.
Are we just programmed to say we are sorry for not being perfect or not fitting into some mold? Are we, as a society, afraid that if we don’t apologize someone or some group of people wont like us or respect us? I mean, I understand that we learned as kids to apologize and be the bigger person, and that’s all gravy, but let’s do ourselves a favor and make sure our apologies are for something we actually did wrong. Stop thinking about how people perceive you, because ironically, because this intern apologized so much, I can tell you I didn’t view him as more of a man… I viewed him as weak and incapable.
THIS IS NOT an open invitation to be an asshole and stop apologizing all together. This is a mere suggestion to shine a little awareness on how many times you apologize and why. I challenge you to think about this and take it seriously. When you apologize, do you dismiss yourself from the task or responsibility all together? If you are late to work because you got stuck in traffic, are you actually sorry? I am not sorry. Shit happens. I am not going to make myself feel like crap because I couldn’t travel to the future and then back to the past and tell myself to leave 15 minutes earlier. Instead of saying, I am sorry I am late, I think I’ll just say, I am sorry I couldn’t make the meeting on time. That’s a true statement. If you are habitually late… that is an actual problem and you should probably work on that. And maybe stop apologizing for being late and start apologizing for not being able to fix that issue.
Ok, I think you get the point, right? Let’s try a little self-reflection shall we?
I’m going to start right now as I sip on my second “Figgy Pop”.
P.S.- The picture posted is my actual Figgy Pop. Just incase you were wondering. You're welcome.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Mara Shultz is a young entrepreneur that prides herself on being a Jack Of All Trades. She is an award winning songwriter and a founder and partner of Market Share Consultants and The Online Kitchen Designer. She leads Ring The World Together as a RE:definer, supporting and building a community for victims of sexual abuse/assault, molestation and rape. With over 5 years of sales and marketing experience in the home improvement industry she has learned training techniques and hopes to create thousands of successful advertising and marketing campaigns.
Mara has a love for writing blogs, mostly in a sarcastic tone. She is known for witty, off of the wall posts, professionally, and writes raw and vulnerable personal blogs. You can follow her on www.ringtheworldtogether.com/impacts or her LinkedIn page www.linkedin.com/in/marashultz
Published by Mara Shultz