Sep 8, 2016, 2:06:53 PM Life and Styles

I’ve been thinking a lot about this topic over the last couple of years. Who am I really, who do I want to be, is this all there is to me?

As a little girl I was raised to be ‘bigger’ than I was. I was expected to be more mature than my age and it was seen as a privilege and achievement by myself and others. The cost of being mature was that I never really enjoyed as much of my childhood as I could have. However, till today, my fondest memories are of my childhood.

Where most psychologists will always revert back to childhood trauma as the root of our adult issues, my childhood seemed a happy and complete one. This was despite me being unaware of all the underlying currents of being adopted, a poverty mind set and interesting family dynamics.

For me the most difficult part of my life was when I was a teenager. The loving family relationships seemed to change overnight when I became an early adult. Hormones coupled with a driving personality that was dubbed ‘pushing people to their boundaries’ made for an intense experience. I attended an art school where creativity was encouraged while extreme discipline, to the point of breaking the soul, was enforced in my area of speciality being ballet. I never really felt like I quite fitted this ‘out there’ creative mould but also feel like I would not have adapted well in a mainstream school either. Perhaps this is why today I feel such a strong urge to home school my own children.

And so school came to an end and it was time to enter the working world. My dream of becoming a ballet teacher was soon disappearing like smoke on the water when a change of curriculum plus low earning potential made me choose to enter the corporate world. Along with it came an awakening that I can be more than what I am forced to believe by society and limiting beliefs of my own.

As I climbed the corporate ladder I realised became really specialised and good at what I do. That was until I made a big move to a different city, met a guy who swept me off my feet and became a mother to two beautiful children in one of the most beautiful cities in the world.

I was suddenly faced with the question of what I wanted to teach my children. I realised that I had compromised my own authentic self in order to fit into a mould that had to change every so often because of the diverse set of people I encountered.

The answer for me, at last, is clear. There is no one like you. There is no one that can give and add value to this world and those around you like you. You are here for a purpose and being anything less than who you truly are and can be is taking away from the world. I’m not saying it’s an easy shift to make but if you can take that first step then you’re a step further than where you were. As long as there is progress, development and leading up to fulfilment.

So here’s to saying yes to being you!

Published by Natural New Mama

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