I think I'll just stay home and pull my eyelashes out one by one, it couldn't be any less painful.

I think I'll just stay home and pull my eyelashes out one by one, it couldn't be any less painful.

Sep 13, 2016, 11:44:23 AM Opinion

Tuesday, 18 January 1994

Dear S,

Just met Mum for lunch at Collins Place.  I only had my home made lunch of jam and vegemite sandwiches, so she shouted me a falafel.  She told me of your poisoning attempt on Jack’s life.  Fiendishly clever Sis!  Tell me, I’ve never heard of having to fill a kettle with acid to clean it, why are kettles in England different to Australian kettles? Bizarre.  If I was Jack I wouldn’t be so worried about my belly as I would be of the acid passing out.  Now there’s some real pain!

I've been going over the sums for this unit thing with Mum, and all I really need is another $2,000 a year.  The idea is really growing on me.  I want to own my own home by the time I’m thirty, so I’d really better get started.  There are some delicious one-bedroom renovated units on George Street, East Melbourne for $160,000, with Victorian fittings and terra cotta tiled floors etcetera.  Probably a bit out of my range, shame though, they’re really nice.  I’m going to keep an eye out over the next few months, see what’s around, though ultimately it’s up to Mum, I mean, she may change her mind or whatever.  I’m just going to keep my options open.  God I sound like someone I’d put in my book!


Wednesday, 19 January 1994

Just met Josh for lunch, God what a socialite I am this week!  It was good to see him again, though I think I like him a lot more when it’s just him and me, he’s different when other people are around. At least it was good to be able to talk about interesting things though.  You know, books and philosophy (I know that sounds a bit wanky) and stuff like that.  There’s no-one else I can talk to about that sort of thing, and I realise now that it shows.  I haven’t been able to find anyone with similar interests so I've just let my own slide.  Josh and I chatted about how crappy our housemates are too, and for a moment, I was actually considering moving in with him, but I’ve come to my senses.  Josh has too many friends who like to drop over.  He’s learned a lot about living out of home since we house shared, but he is essentially a messy person.  I can see I’m doing my typical thing with this whole unit proposal, I’m thrashing the idea to death when I should just take my time and think about it properly instead of being impatient and wanting to do it yesterday.  I have to be practical.


Thursday, 20 January 1994

I've been looking in the newspapers property guide and getting frustrated.  Isn’t this supposed to be a bloody recession? Where’s all the cheap houses?  I’m kind of going off the idea of the unit now.  I’m thinking about getting a house and getting three people to move in for three years, and they could cover the extra cost.  And seeing as I’ll be there, I can look after it and closely vet the occupants of the house.  Ah, who cares?  It’ll probably never pan out anyway.


Tuesday, 25 January 1994

Well at least our house problems are solved now.  Belinda told us on Sunday that she is moving out. THANK GOD!  I went into her room to get some ice trays while she wasn’t home and you wouldn’t believe what I saw.  I've been to squats and seen some of the most squalid houses you could imagine, but this blew me away.  She had two bowls of decomposing cat food in there.  So when the cat wouldn’t eat the food that was in the first bowl, instead of cleaning it out, she used a second one and then left both to rot.  There was a cardboard box in the corner full of rubbish and food scraps that was covered in ants, and the ice trays had cigarette butts in them.  There were also several glasses and mugs full of mould.  Now when I say full of mould, I mean they contained nothing but mould.  The milk or whatever started off the culture had been completely used up and there was about three inches of pure mould in the cups!  The carpet is totally fucked and will need steam cleaning and I found two of my books and a cd in there.  They’ve also been cooking meat in there on Penny’s Jaffle maker when they know she’s a vegetarian and that those things can’t be washed properly.  The spew I told you about is all down her bedroom wall near the window and is now all caked up.  She is without doubt the most disgusting, putrid, filthy piece of shit I have ever had the displeasure of coming across.  She’s also two months behind on the rent.  Bitch.  We’ve asked Brett to move in mainly because we know that he’s the antithesis of Belinda.  He is scrupulously clean (almost to a fault) and is really good with bills.  The main thing I have to do is make sure that we don’t crowd each other and spend too much time together.

Christopher Watts called me on Sunday too, we discussed art and I enjoyed the conversation, so we’re meeting for lunch sometime this week.  He’s living in Fitzroy now in a warehouse with one other guy and he’s only paying $70 a week in rent.  That’s incredibly cheap.  You wouldn’t believe how hot it is here, it’s 38 degrees today and it must be 40 in this building.  I was not meant for this climate.  Dad has invited me up to Pomona and his whole clan (even Nana and Pop) in a fourteen seater bus in February.  Whooppee, can you imagine nine hours on the road with all our Aunties, Uncles and Cousins.  I think I’ll just stay home and pull my eyelashes out one by one, it couldn’t be any less painful.  (Bitchy, hey?)

Well I’d better go now and collapse somewhere from heat prostration.  I’ll write again soon.

Love J

Published by S W

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