Fear…it is the act of being afraid, scared or worried that something can cause the feeling of being unpleasant. It is an emotion that everybody wants to avoid. But is life not about looking at everything with a glass-half-full attitude? Could it be possible that the presence of fear is the only indication that we are as lucky to know that we have something to lose?
With all of its twists and turns, life can be so unfair, unpredictable – there may be times where fear can keep you from living. Personally, I see it as a way to drive my will to live. I sit here before you, behind a computer admitting that life is scary. I have a month or so before my new journey begins at the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City. I sit here waiting, anticipating what my life will become. Will I have time to have fun? Will I be good enough at what I do? Will I make friends? The list goes on with questions that constantly make me reconsider my dreams. And then something remarkable happens; an epiphany if you will. I think back to the decisions and paths I have taken. When I was eighteen I was worried about college and “if” I was going to walk the right path that would get me to where I want to be. It was the fear of not accomplishing a dream in my future that drove me to overcome whatever I had been thinking, and as a result I ended up interning in the exact career I have wished to pursue. It was the fear of not having friends when I entered community college that pushed me to make some, and in return I found very special people that taught me a lot, and very special people that I could not imagine this journey without. It was also a fear of mine that I would be looked down upon or what if going to community college would stunt my professional growth, but in the end, it was an extra step to ensure my success thus far. It was the fear of losing that taught me how to push through. It is fear of losing everything that makes you want to fight like hell to keep your happiness within reach. And for that, I am forever grateful.
For many people it is really difficult to see the light in a thunderstorm, but I was raised by two parents that taught me otherwise. Fear seems horrible – it is that same emotion that can keep you from experiencing many things, but what if you took all that energy and instead of using it to do whatever you can to hide, you use that same energy to fight the hardest battles you will come across?
So sure, I still sit here and I can say that I am scared. I start school the last week of August, and there is so much that could go wrong, but only if I let fear itself take me over. I want to succeed in life. I want that job that I can leap out of bed in the morning and be happy to go to. I want a family that I can build memories with. I want those amazing friends that will not leave my side, especially when the going gets rough. I want to travel. I want to laugh. I want to experience life to the fullest. If you want something badly enough, you need to fight for it. You need to stand tall, with loved ones holding your hand and fight, because if you do not fight for yourself, than who will?
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Published by Samiellie